Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-10-16

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

You would like to reduce your working hours in order to study part time.

Write a letter to your boss. In your letter

• explain why you want to reduce your working hours
• say which hours you would like to work
• describe how your part-time studies would benefit your employer

You do NOT need to write any addresses.

Begin your letter as follows:

Dear ....................................,

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Dear Jacob,

I am writing you regarding a crucial matter of my job that i have continued my studies but my long shifts are now hurdle , I hope this issue would be resolve soon.

I am working as monitoring officer in your office for the last three years , my shift lasts for more than 8 hours per day. I was offered a PHD scholarship and i opted it and resumed my studies in last month, because of my keen devotion to my both task including studies and job I am unable to manage my long shifts.

In order to maintain my academic schedule I need to replace my morning shifts along with reduced hours of working ,so that I can manage my research work at day time in supervision of my consultant.

Additionally, after accomplishing my higher studies I would be equipped with more skill and knowledge that would leads to enhance my role as a monitoring officer in your organization.

I am hoping a best response from your office.

Yours sincerely,

Faisal

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You address all three requested points: you explain that long shifts make it difficult to manage your PhD studies, request a change to your working hours, and describe how further study could improve your contribution as a monitoring officer. The scholarship and research details make the reason relevant. However, the requested schedule is not specific enough: “replace my morning shifts” does not clearly state which hours or days you want to work, and the proposed benefit to the employer is only briefly described as gaining “more skill and knowledge.” Specify a workable schedule and explain how particular research or professional skills would help your team. The purpose is clear overall, though some parts are less fully developed than others.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The letter has a recognisable structure, moving from the reason for writing to your circumstances, your request, and the potential benefit to the employer. Paragraphing helps separate these points, and expressions such as “Additionally” signal a new idea. However, the opening sentence combines several points with commas, making the progression harder to follow, and the request paragraph does not clearly distinguish the hours you want from the reason for that schedule. Some links, including “In order to” and “Additionally,” feel mechanical rather than smoothly integrated. Use shorter, more clearly focused sentences and state the proposed schedule directly before explaining how it accommodates your research.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use a reasonable range of vocabulary for a workplace request, including “monitoring officer,” “scholarship,” “academic schedule,” and “research work.” These choices communicate the main situation, and “accomplishing my higher studies” shows an attempt to use more formal language. However, several word choices and collocations are inaccurate or unnatural, such as “long shifts are now hurdle,” “I opted it,” and “a best response.” The phrase “more skill and knowledge” is also imprecise in this context. Aim for natural professional expressions and check whether verbs and nouns commonly occur together. More precise wording would make the request sound clearer and more polished without requiring unusually advanced vocabulary.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt both simple and more complex sentence forms, for example, the sentence beginning “because of my keen devotion” and the clause “after accomplishing my higher studies.” The main message remains understandable, but some grammatical errors occur in sentence construction, verb forms, agreement, articles, and punctuation. For instance, “I am writing you regarding” needs a different grammatical pattern, while “this issue would be resolve” has an incorrect verb form. In “knowledge that would leads,” the verb does not agree with the modal construction. The opening sentence is also joined with commas where clearer sentence boundaries are needed. Review these patterns and proofread for capitalisation and punctuation to improve accuracy.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

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