Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-11-13

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

 

You started in your present job two years ago. You now feel it is important for your career development to move to a different department in the same company.

Write a letter to your manager. In your letter

• say what you have learned in your present job
• suggest how the company would benefit from moving you to a different department
• explain why you do not wish to leave the company

You do NOT need to write any addresses.

Begin your letter as follows:

Dear ....................................,

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Dear Mr Travis,

I hope you find this well. I am writing regarding a request for transfering me to a different department for my career development. I would like to explain the situation in detail and I would appreciate your assistance in this situation.

To begin with, I have been working at my present job for about two years. I have spent good amount of time in this department and have acquired operational and systematic knowledge about various processes. I am capable of training new employees about their basic job duties in the department.

Another important factor I would like to mention is that there is vacancy in Ecom department. I would like to make a suggestion about moving me this department, so I that I can contribute to this company with my knowledge and experience. I have also worked in a different scenerio but in a another company.

I am grateful to have an opportunity to be working in this company. I have no plans to leave this company because I really like the its work environment and atmosphere.

I appreciate your attention to this matter and I hope to hear from you soon.

Yours faithfully

Dilpreet Singh

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You address all three requested points: you describe learning “operational and systematic knowledge,” suggest a move to the Ecom department, and explain that you value the company’s work environment. The purpose of the letter is clear, and the tone is generally appropriate. However, the learning point is quite general, and the benefit to the company is not fully explained: saying you can train new employees is useful, but the link between your experience and the needs of the Ecom department remains unclear. The reference to having worked in a different scenario at another company is also not explained, so its relevance is uncertain. Add specific skills and show how they would help the new department, while making your reason for staying more personal and persuasive.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The letter has a clear overall arrangement, with separate paragraphs for your experience, the proposed transfer, and your wish to remain with the company. Phrases such as “To begin with” and “Another important factor” help signal the progression, and the closing is appropriate. This organisation is effective, though some linking feels formulaic, and the connection between ideas is occasionally unclear. For example, the sentence about having worked in a different scenario at another company appears after the Ecom proposal but is not linked to how it supports that proposal. The opening also repeats “situation” in close succession. To strengthen the flow, make each paragraph develop one clear point and use transitions that show the precise relationship between your experience and the company’s benefit.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use a suitable range of workplace vocabulary, including “career development,” “operational knowledge,” “processes,” and “vacancy,” which makes the purpose understandable. There are also attempts at more specific language, such as describing your ability to train new employees. However, several word choices and collocations are inaccurate or awkward, including “I hope you find this well,” “good amount of time,” and “contribute to this company with my knowledge.” Spelling errors such as “transfering” and “scenerio,” along with the unclear phrase “different scenerio,” reduce precision. Aim for natural professional expressions and check spelling carefully. More precise terms for the skills you have gained and the contribution you could make in Ecom would also make the letter more convincing.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 6.0

You use a mix of simple and more developed sentence forms, and most of the message remains easy to follow. For example, “I have no plans to leave this company because I really like the its work environment and atmosphere” expresses a clear reason, despite an error. Some grammatical inaccuracies occur in sentence construction and articles: “moving me this department” needs a preposition, “there is vacancy” needs an article, and “the its” uses two determiners together. The phrase “so I that I can contribute” also contains an unnecessary word. These errors rarely prevent understanding, but they make the writing less controlled. Review article use, prepositions after verbs such as “move,” and sentence editing to remove duplicated or misplaced words.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

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