Band 7.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 7.0 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-07-25

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

 

You started in your present job two years ago. You now feel it is important for your career development to move to a different department in the same company.

Write a letter to your manager. In your letter

• say what you have learned in your present job
• suggest how the company would benefit from moving you to a different department
• explain why you do not wish to leave the company

You do NOT need to write any addresses.

Begin your letter as follows:

Dear ....................................,

Student answer (Band 7.0)

Dear Manager,

I am writing to request a change in my role for better future opportunities and I would like to apply for an Assistant Manager position by staying at same branch.

As I have been working as a Shift Supervisor for the past two years and I have become proficient in various tasks such as handling rush hours as well as managing the team.

A couple months ago, I completed a course in management where I developed my leadership and organization skills. Moreover, I believe these skills will be beneficial for the company's growth.

The primary factor to opt same company is because of the positive environment. Additionally, this specific branch provides a plenty of benefits to their employees related to health and safety.

It would be appreciated if you could look into my request and take necessary steps. I am looking forward to hearing from you.

Yours sincerely,

Jasvir

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 7.0

The letter covers all three bullet points required by the prompt. You clearly state what you have learned, explain the benefits to the company, and provide reasons for wanting to stay. However, the development of these ideas is somewhat brief. For instance, while you mention 'leadership and organization skills,' explaining how these specific skills would translate to the new department would have strengthened the response. The tone is appropriate for a formal letter to a manager, and the purpose is clear from the outset. To reach a higher band, ensure that your arguments are slightly more elaborated to demonstrate a fuller engagement with the task requirements.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 7.5

The letter is logically organized with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a closing. You use some cohesive devices such as 'Moreover,' 'Additionally,' and 'The primary factor,' which help guide the reader through your points. However, the transition between the first and second paragraphs is slightly abrupt. The paragraphing is appropriate for a formal letter. To improve, try to vary your linking words further and ensure that each paragraph flows more naturally into the next, rather than relying on a list-like structure of points.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.5

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'proficient,' 'development,' and 'environment.' There are some minor inaccuracies, such as 'opt same company' (should be 'opt for the same company') and 'a plenty of benefits' (should be 'plenty of benefits' or 'a wide range of benefits'). While the vocabulary is sufficient to convey your meaning clearly, it lacks the variety and precision of less common lexical items that would be expected at a higher band level. Focusing on collocations and more precise phrasing will help elevate your score.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.5

You use a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. There are some grammatical errors, such as 'staying at same branch' (missing an article) and 'The primary factor to opt same company is because of...' (which is slightly awkward; 'The primary reason I wish to remain at this company is...' would be more accurate). While these errors are present, they do not impede communication. To improve, pay closer attention to article usage and prepositions, and try to incorporate a wider variety of complex sentence structures to demonstrate greater control over your writing.

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