Band 7.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 7.0 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-07-27

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

 

You started in your present job two years ago. You now feel it is important for your career development to move to a different department in the same company.

Write a letter to your manager. In your letter

• say what you have learned in your present job
• suggest how the company would benefit from moving you to a different department
• explain why you do not wish to leave the company

You do NOT need to write any addresses.

Begin your letter as follows:

Dear ....................................,

Student answer (Band 7.0)

Dear Sir,

I am writing to formally request for change in the department at the company. I have spent two years in my present department and i feel that it is important to be transferred to a new department for my career development.

Currently, i have learnt a lot from my present department, female medical ward. It is a ward i so much like everything about. I learnt about safety in patient care, that my client comes first in everything i do. I also learned more about Nurse-patient relationship, i was able to practice that more often which helped me in patient care. They were able to trust me for their care.

I believe that the company will benefit from moving me to a different department. I recently completed my masters in Nursing management from Oxford University, where i was trained and also certified. It will help the firm so well if am transfer to Nursing management department because i learned about delegation, auditing, managing the hospital resources.

I do not wish to leave the organisation because i like how it run and every worker is being cared for and appreciated.

Thanks for your consideration.

Yours Faithfully,

Lynda.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 7.0

The letter addresses all three bullet points required by the prompt. You clearly state what you learned in your current role, explain the benefits of your transfer, and provide a valid reason for staying with the company. The tone is appropriate for a formal letter to a manager. However, the development of ideas is somewhat basic. For instance, while you mention your Master's degree, you could further elaborate on how your specific skills in 'delegation' or 'auditing' would directly solve current problems in the management department to make your argument more persuasive. Overall, the task is fully addressed, though the depth of the content could be improved to reach a higher band.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 7.5

The letter is logically organized with a clear introduction, body paragraphs for each bullet point, and a closing. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate distinct ideas. You use some cohesive devices, such as 'Currently' and 'I also learned', to link sentences. However, the flow between some sentences is slightly mechanical, and the use of referencing could be more varied. For example, the transition between your current ward experience and your academic qualifications could be smoother. Despite these minor issues, the progression of ideas is clear throughout the letter, and the structure is easy to follow.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.5

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'formally request', 'career development', and 'delegation'. There are some instances of slightly unnatural phrasing, such as 'It will help the firm so well' or 'I so much like everything about'. While these do not impede communication, they limit the precision of your expression. To improve, focus on more natural collocations and formal professional terminology. The vocabulary is sufficient to convey your meaning clearly, but it lacks the flexibility and sophistication required for higher band scores.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.5

You use a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, such as 'I am writing to formally request...' and 'It will help the firm so well if am transfer to...'. There are several grammatical errors, including subject-verb agreement issues ('if am transfer' should be 'if I am transferred') and inconsistent capitalization of the pronoun 'i'. Additionally, there are minor punctuation errors and missing articles. While these errors are noticeable, they do not prevent the reader from understanding your message. To reach a higher band, focus on proofreading for basic grammatical accuracy and ensuring consistent capitalization.

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