Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-07-27

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

 

You started in your present job two years ago. You now feel it is important for your career development to move to a different department in the same company.

Write a letter to your manager. In your letter

• say what you have learned in your present job
• suggest how the company would benefit from moving you to a different department
• explain why you do not wish to leave the company

You do NOT need to write any addresses.

Begin your letter as follows:

Dear ....................................,

Student answer (Band 6.5)

Dear Madam,

Hope you are doing well. I am writing this letter to express some of my thoughts regarding the transfer of my department.

I have been working for the last two years and have learned many good skills from this company, such as good leadership skills and communication skills. These are very vital for my personal growth.

I would like to share some of my ideas to transfer to a different department because I already have experience in finance, and you need a man for this department. I can easily manage our company's finances with my knowledge under your leadership. I can fulfill your requirements.

I do not think of leaving the company for many reasons. Firstly, the good team members and positive vibes in our company. Secondly, you gave me a chance to learn many things without proper previous experience.

Your answer would be appreciated.

Thanks, Gautam Patel

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.5

The letter addresses all three bullet points required by the prompt. You clearly state what you have learned, suggest how the company would benefit from your transfer, and explain your desire to remain with the firm. However, the development of these ideas is somewhat limited. For instance, the explanation of how the company would benefit is quite brief and relies on a generic statement about managing finances. To reach a higher band, you should provide more specific examples of how your skills would add value to the new department, such as mentioning specific software proficiency or past projects that demonstrate your readiness for the transition.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 7.0

The letter follows a logical structure, with each paragraph addressing one of the required points. You use basic cohesive devices such as 'Firstly' and 'Secondly' to organize your reasons for staying. However, the flow between sentences is sometimes a bit mechanical, and the transition between the introduction and the body paragraphs could be smoother. The paragraphing is appropriate for a formal letter, and the overall progression of ideas is clear enough for the reader to follow your intent without difficulty.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.5

Your vocabulary is adequate for the task, allowing you to convey your message clearly. You use some relevant business-related terms like 'transfer', 'finance', and 'department'. However, the range is somewhat limited, and there is a reliance on simple phrasing. For example, 'good skills' and 'good team members' are repetitive and lack precision. To improve, try to incorporate more sophisticated collocations and descriptive adjectives that reflect a professional tone, which would demonstrate a wider range of vocabulary and better control over word choice.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.5

You demonstrate a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While the meaning is always clear, there are some minor grammatical inaccuracies, such as 'transfer of my department' (which sounds like you are moving the department itself rather than yourself) and 'you need a man for this department' (which is slightly informal and gender-specific). Punctuation is generally correct, but ensure that your sentence variety is increased by using more complex subordinating conjunctions. The errors present do not impede communication, but they do prevent the writing from reaching a higher level of accuracy.

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