Band 7.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 7.5 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-07-30

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

 

You started in your present job two years ago. You now feel it is important for your career development to move to a different department in the same company.

Write a letter to your manager. In your letter

• say what you have learned in your present job
• suggest how the company would benefit from moving you to a different department
• explain why you do not wish to leave the company

You do NOT need to write any addresses.

Begin your letter as follows:

Dear ....................................,

Student answer (Band 7.5)

Dear Rae,

I hope you are doing well. I am writing this email to formally request and consider my role to be moved for my career development to a different department within the same line of business - Solutions Management department.

I have been working as a Financial Services Representative in the past two years with ABC bank. I have gained many competitive skills such as communication, leadership, critical thinking, problem-solving and analyzing the profile by assessing their current net worth including the liabilities.

As there is a new opportunity in the Solutions department, I would like you to nominate my name for that post. This will not only uplift my professional career, but also will allow me to show my full strength and my potential of what I am capable of doing in that role; by presenting all the skills I have learned so far.

I genuinely do not wish to let go this opportunity off from my hand and would like to continue my career within the same company. This company has taught me many useful things to survive in this corporate world and have helped me in many ways by accommodating my shift during my final exams.

Therefore, for all these reasons I sincerely hope you will consider my decision for choosing to move to a different department.

I look forward to hearing from you and hoping to end this conversation on a positive note. Also, kindly let me know if you need any further details from my end.

Warm Regards,

Sahil.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 7.5

You have addressed all three bullet points of the task effectively. You clearly outlined your experience, explained the benefits of your transfer, and provided a strong rationale for staying with the company. The tone is appropriate for a formal letter to a manager. To reach a higher band, ensure that your explanation of how the company benefits from your move is more specific; currently, it focuses more on your personal career growth than on the tangible value you would bring to the new department. Nevertheless, the purpose of the letter is clear and the response is well-developed.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 7.5

The letter is logically organized with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a professional closing. Each paragraph focuses on a specific aspect of the prompt, which helps the reader follow your argument easily. You use some cohesive devices like 'Therefore' and 'not only... but also' to link ideas. However, some transitions feel slightly mechanical or repetitive. To improve, try to vary your linking words and ensure that the flow between sentences is smoother, particularly in the second paragraph where you list your skills.

Lexical Resource — Band 7.0

You demonstrate a good range of vocabulary suitable for a professional context, such as 'formally request', 'competitive skills', and 'corporate world'. There are some minor issues with word choice and collocation, such as 'let go this opportunity off from my hand' (which is redundant and unnatural) and 'nominate my name' (usually, one would say 'consider me for the post'). Despite these minor inaccuracies, your vocabulary is sufficient to convey your message clearly and professionally throughout the letter.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 7.0

You use a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, which is appropriate for this task. There are some grammatical slips, such as 'consider my role to be moved' (which is slightly awkward) and 'have helped me' (where the subject 'This company' is singular, so it should be 'has helped me'). Additionally, 'in the past two years' should be 'over the past two years'. While these errors are present, they do not impede communication, and your meaning remains clear throughout the letter.

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