Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-07-31
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
You started in your present job two years ago. You now feel it is important for your career development to move to a different department in the same company.
Write a letter to your manager. In your letter
- say what you have learned in your present job
- suggest how the company would benefit from moving you to a different department
- explain why you do not wish to leave the company
You do NOT need to write any addresses.
Begin your letter as follows:
Dear ....................................,
Student answer (Band 6.5)
Dear Sir,
I hope this lettter finds you in a good way,
As I was your employee in your company since two years. I am an expert in dealing with complex situations, data handling and problem solving department. And I am learned alot of new technologies in my profession. In this letter, I would like to change my department in your company and please hire me in designing department.
As I am a Data Analysist, I laerned many different types of problem solving and machine learning programs from my seniors.
I have studied Data Science as well as Designing. If you change my department in designing department, I am sure it would be beneficial for the company. I would like to design the logo of the company as well as marketing websites. And it is a crusial for the company to chnage the logo so that people would like to come and join us.
This company gives alot of experties so I am not able to move from here. They gives so many extra benefits. I gain extra knowledge from my seniors and it has a very friendly environment.
Yours Sincerely,
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 6.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 6.0 |
| Overall | 6.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.5
You have addressed all three bullet points required by the prompt: describing your current learning, suggesting benefits for the company, and explaining your desire to stay. However, the development of these ideas is somewhat limited. For example, while you mention wanting to move to the 'designing department', the explanation of how your skills would benefit the company is quite general. To improve, try to provide more specific examples of how your data analysis background could specifically enhance design projects. The tone is generally appropriate for a formal letter, though the structure could be more professional.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5
The letter is organized into paragraphs, which helps the reader follow your points. However, the use of cohesive devices is somewhat mechanical and repetitive. Phrases like 'As I am' and 'And' are used frequently to start sentences, which limits the flow. To reach a higher band, try using a wider variety of linking words and transition phrases, such as 'Furthermore,' 'Consequently,' or 'In addition to this.' Additionally, some sentences feel disjointed, making the progression of ideas feel slightly abrupt rather than smooth.
Lexical Resource — Band 6.0
Your vocabulary is adequate for the task, but it lacks the precision and variety expected at higher levels. There are several spelling errors, such as 'lettter', 'Analysist', 'laerned', and 'crusial', which distract the reader. You also rely on basic phrasing like 'gives alot of experties' and 'good way'. To improve, focus on using more precise professional terminology and ensure you check your spelling carefully. Expanding your range of collocations—for example, using 'professional development' instead of 'extra knowledge'—would significantly improve your score.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0
You demonstrate a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede clarity. Issues include incorrect verb tenses ('I am learned', 'They gives'), preposition errors, and awkward phrasing ('I hope this lettter finds you in a good way'). Subject-verb agreement is a recurring problem. While your meaning is generally understandable, the frequency of these errors prevents a higher score. Focus on mastering basic sentence construction and proofreading for common errors like subject-verb agreement and article usage.
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