Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-08-03

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

 

You started in your present job two years ago. You now feel it is important for your career development to move to a different department in the same company.

Write a letter to your manager. In your letter

• say what you have learned in your present job
• suggest how the company would benefit from moving you to a different department
• explain why you do not wish to leave the company

You do NOT need to write any addresses.

Begin your letter as follows:

Dear ....................................,

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Dear Sir or Madam,

I am writing this letter to request to transfer my work from management department to human resource department of the company.

I have been working in the management section of the firm since 2 years. I have learnt time management, communication and leadership skills by working in the team to mange different tasks while working in a team.

I have MBA degree which is the major key to grow in administrative department. Now, by working with your company, I am familiar with all the policies, rules and regulations. Moreover, I know about the job roles and responsibilities for all the employees working in different departments at different positions. That is why, I can handle the human resource department in an effective manner which would help company to hire talented and efficient and responsible staff to enhance the productivity of the organization.

To be honest, I want to work according to my qualification and the company gives me the comfortable platform to thrive in to increase my economic potential. Due to the well equipped facilities, hardworking and cooperative colleagues, I do not want to leave the work.

I would really appreciate if you could shift my work to the HR department where I will show my abilities to rise the yield of company.

Looking forward to hear a positive response from your side.

Navpreet.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.5

You have addressed all three bullet points required by the task. You clearly identified what you learned in your current role, explained the benefits of your transfer to the HR department, and provided valid reasons for wanting to stay with the company. The tone is appropriate for a formal letter to a manager. To improve, ensure that your ideas are more fully developed; for instance, when mentioning your MBA, you could explicitly link your academic knowledge to specific HR functions like recruitment or employee relations to make your argument more persuasive.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The letter follows a logical structure with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a closing. You use some cohesive devices such as 'Moreover' and 'That is why' to connect your ideas. However, the transition between paragraphs could be smoother. Some sentences feel slightly disjointed, and the use of cohesive devices is occasionally mechanical. To reach a higher band, focus on using a wider variety of linking words and ensure that each paragraph has a clear topic sentence that guides the reader through your argument.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'administrative department', 'productivity', and 'economic potential'. However, there are some inaccuracies in word choice and collocation, such as 'transfer my work' (instead of 'request a transfer'), 'mange' (spelling error), and 'rise the yield' (which is not a standard collocation in this context). To improve, focus on learning common collocations used in professional business correspondence and proofread carefully to avoid simple spelling errors.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

You use a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While the meaning is generally clear, there are several grammatical errors, such as 'since 2 years' (should be 'for 2 years'), 'I have MBA degree' (missing article 'an'), and 'Looking forward to hear' (should be 'hearing'). These errors do not impede communication, but they do occur frequently enough to prevent a higher score. Focus on mastering articles, prepositions, and verb patterns to increase your accuracy.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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