Band 7.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 7.0 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-08-03

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

 

You started in your present job two years ago. You now feel it is important for your career development to move to a different department in the same company.

Write a letter to your manager. In your letter

  • say what you have learned in your present job
  • suggest how the company would benefit from moving you to a different department
  • explain why you do not wish to leave the company

You do NOT need to write any addresses.

Begin your letter as follows:

Dear ....................................,

Student answer (Band 7.0)

Dear MR Dean,

I hope you are doing well. I am writing this letter regarding my interest in the Pharmacy department as I would really love to get transfer from Front end department to the Pharmacy.

As working in a front end I have attained some skills which are really helpful for me to do my work more efficiently. During my work as a cashier in Costco I am meeting to hundreds of people everyday. Because of this I have really improved my communication skill. Moreover, I have learnt to handle pressure while, meeting the requirements of the customers at the right time and build patience.

Now I would like to join pharmacy department as it is crucial for my career development. I have completed my studies from SAIT in pharmacy so, this department will work best for me and I can apply the knowledge that I have learned from my academics.

Costco is well known company and I really love to be the part of this company. I have made genuine connections here and love the fact that every employee is valued here. Furthermore, there are ample of the benefits that I am getting as an employee.

Please let me know your decision about this as soon as possible so that I can apply for the job. I look forward to hearing from you soon.

Yours Sincerely,

Hardeep Kaur

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response7.0
Coherence and Cohesion7.0
Lexical Resource6.5
Grammatical Range and Accuracy6.5
Overall7.0

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 7.0

The letter covers all three bullet points required by the prompt. You clearly state what you have learned in your current role, explain the benefits of your transfer to the pharmacy department, and express your commitment to the company. The tone is appropriate for a formal letter to a manager. To reach a higher band, ensure that the connection between your current skills and the new role is more explicitly detailed. For example, you could elaborate on how your specific experience with customer service in the front end will translate into better patient care in the pharmacy.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 7.0

The letter is logically organized with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. You use some cohesive devices such as 'Moreover', 'Furthermore', and 'Because of this' to link ideas. However, the flow between sentences is occasionally mechanical. For instance, the transition between discussing your current skills and your desire to move to the pharmacy department could be smoother. Paragraphing is used correctly to separate distinct ideas, which helps the reader follow your argument easily.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.5

You demonstrate a sufficient range of vocabulary to convey your message clearly. Phrases like 'career development', 'genuine connections', and 'apply the knowledge' are used effectively. However, there are some minor errors in word choice and collocation, such as 'get transfer' (should be 'get a transfer') and 'ample of the benefits' (should be 'ample benefits'). While these errors do not impede communication, they prevent the response from reaching a higher band. Using more precise professional terminology would further enhance your score.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.5

You use a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While the meaning is always clear, there are several grammatical slips, such as 'As working in a front end' (should be 'While working in the front end') and 'I have completed my studies from SAIT' (should be 'at SAIT'). Additionally, there are minor punctuation and article errors, such as 'join pharmacy department' (should be 'join the pharmacy department'). Despite these errors, the majority of your sentences are error-free and do not cause difficulty for the reader.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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