Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-08-04

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

 

You started in your present job two years ago. You now feel it is important for your career development to move to a different department in the same company.

Write a letter to your manager. In your letter

  • say what you have learned in your present job
  • suggest how the company would benefit from moving you to a different department
  • explain why you do not wish to leave the company

You do NOT need to write any addresses.

Begin your letter as follows:

Dear ....................................,

Student answer (Band 6.5)

Dear Jason,

I am writing this letter regarding changiong department, as i have completed two years with this company.

I have learned a lot in last two years working as a Team Lead, it instilled me with a lot of useful skills like Time Management, Leadership, Communication, Managing the Team, Delegation and many more. I truly cherish the time I spend on this current position as I got to learn a lot from my colleagues.

With these skills set I believe that it can add a lot more value if I change my department to Accounting team. Also, there are many new-hires that are currently struggling and they need some support and assistance from some Senior Manager who has solid work experience. If this department is doing good then it will directly benefit the comapany in its success.

I do not wish to leave this company because it provides competetive company benefits, employee assistance program, an ideal work environment, salary increments and most importantly career advancements through promotions and internal postings. Moreover, I have experienced excellent workplace environment and career growth.

Thanks you very much considering this request, hoping to hear back from you soon.

Your Faithfully,

Jigga Nigga

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response7.0
Coherence and Cohesion6.5
Lexical Resource6.0
Grammatical Range and Accuracy6.0
Overall6.5

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 7.0

The letter addresses all three bullet points of the prompt effectively. You clearly outline the skills gained in your current role, explain the potential benefits of your transfer to the accounting department, and provide valid reasons for wanting to remain with the company. The tone is appropriate for a formal business letter. To reach a higher band, ensure that the connection between your current skills and the specific requirements of the accounting department is more explicitly detailed, as the current explanation is slightly generic. Overall, the purpose of the letter is clear and the response is well-developed.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5

The letter is logically organized into distinct paragraphs, each serving a specific purpose. You use some cohesive devices such as 'Moreover' and 'Also' to link ideas. However, the flow between sentences could be improved by using a wider variety of linking words and ensuring that referencing is always precise. For instance, the transition between the second and third paragraphs is a bit abrupt. Improving the use of cohesive devices would help the text flow more naturally and demonstrate a higher level of control over the structure of the letter.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'career development', 'delegation', and 'internal postings'. However, there are several spelling errors, such as 'changiong', 'comapany', and 'competetive', which detract from the professional quality of the writing. While these errors do not impede communication, they indicate a need for more careful proofreading. To improve, try to incorporate more precise collocations and ensure that common business terminology is spelled correctly to convey a more polished and professional image.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

The letter contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While the meaning is generally clear, there are several grammatical slips, such as 'I truly cherish the time I spend on this current position' (should be 'in') and 'Thanks you very much considering' (should be 'Thank you very much for considering'). Additionally, there are minor punctuation and capitalization issues, such as the lowercase 'i'. To achieve a higher band, you should aim for more error-free sentences and ensure that your verb tenses and prepositions are used with greater accuracy throughout the text.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.