Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-08-04

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

 

You started in your present job two years ago. You now feel it is important for your career development to move to a different department in the same company.

Write a letter to your manager. In your letter

• say what you have learned in your present job
• suggest how the company would benefit from moving you to a different department
• explain why you do not wish to leave the company

You do NOT need to write any addresses.

Begin your letter as follows:

Dear ....................................,

Student answer (Band 6.5)

Dear Manager,

I am writing this letter as I completed two years in my current job as a Management Accountant. Now, I feel it is important for my career and future to join Pricing department as a Financial Pricing Analyst.

In last two years I have learned many things such as statutory reporting, financial planning, budgeting and grants management. I have also developed my knowledge and skills in excel and financial systems. Moreover, I have also enjoyed business partnering with different teams and department while working with them on their budget.

I am carrying couple of years of experience, knowledge, skills and relations with other department which help company in achieving goal on timely manner. I am also open to train my replacement to get them up to the speed.

I have grown my professional career in this company and I wish to continue working here with a career progression and also become a great asset to the company.

Thank you for considering my request.

Kind regards,

James

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 7.0

The letter covers all three bullet points required by the prompt. You clearly state your current experience, explain the benefits of your transfer to the company, and express your commitment to the organization. The tone is appropriate for a formal request to a manager. To reach a higher band, you could expand slightly on the specific benefits to the company; for example, explaining how your current financial knowledge would specifically improve the pricing department's efficiency would make your argument more persuasive and fully developed.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5

The letter is logically organized with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a closing. You use basic cohesive devices such as 'In last two years', 'Moreover', and 'I am also'. However, the flow between sentences is sometimes a bit mechanical. To improve, try using a wider variety of linking words and ensure that your referencing is precise. For instance, in the third paragraph, the transition could be smoother by explicitly linking your past experience to the specific needs of the new department.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using professional terms like 'statutory reporting', 'financial planning', and 'business partnering'. There are some minor errors in collocation and article usage, such as 'join Pricing department' (should be 'the Pricing department') and 'carrying couple of years' (should be 'carrying a couple of years'). While your vocabulary is sufficient to convey your meaning clearly, incorporating more sophisticated collocations or precise professional terminology would elevate the lexical quality of the letter.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

You use a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While your meaning is always clear, there are several grammatical slips, such as missing articles ('in excel', 'on timely manner') and minor tense issues ('as I completed' should be 'as I have completed'). The sentence structures are generally functional, but there is a lack of variety in complex grammatical forms. Focusing on consistent subject-verb agreement and the correct use of articles will help reduce these frequent, though non-impeding, errors.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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