Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-08-05

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

 

You started in your present job two years ago. You now feel it is important for your career development to move to a different department in the same company.

Write a letter to your manager. In your letter

• say what you have learned in your present job
• suggest how the company would benefit from moving you to a different department
• explain why you do not wish to leave the company

You do NOT need to write any addresses.

Begin your letter as follows:

Dear ....................................,

Student answer (Band 6.5)

Dear Umme,

I am writing these letter to express my request to be promoted to the department of procurement from my current department of Sales associate, where I have been working for 2 years.

During my tenure as an sales person I have learned many things. Firstly, I know the reach of our customer base and how we can increase it, by maximizing the products available with us. Secondly, I have learnt to work in fast-pace workplace, solving problem with limited resources, and working in team as well as leading them, all of this learning will help me to reach further.

Additionally, I am aware with issues that are faced at the lower level of management such as, having less stocks during weekends or any public holidays, insufficient back-up items or method. Which are some time neglected by the other managerial levels. I will try my best to solve this problems, as I am aware of this, this will help the firm to manage there supply chain operation smoothly.

I have spend a lot of time in this company, and this was my first job to start my career. I want to work for the success of these company, so all the people who believed in me shall be proud. The working environment is very quite and helpful, that is the reason I do not intend to leave this company.

I am looking for your prompt reply.

Kind regards,

Nizamuddin Memon

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 7.0

The letter addresses all three bullet points required by the prompt. You clearly state what you have learned in your current role, explain how your move to procurement would benefit the company, and provide a sincere reason for wanting to stay. The tone is appropriate for a formal business letter. To reach a higher band, ensure that the connection between your current skills and the new department is more explicitly detailed. For example, while you mention supply chain issues, you could further elaborate on how your specific sales experience provides a unique perspective that would improve procurement efficiency. The ideas are relevant and well-developed throughout the response.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 7.0

The letter is logically organized with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. You use transition signals such as 'Firstly', 'Secondly', and 'Additionally' to guide the reader through your arguments. Paragraphing is used effectively to separate distinct ideas. However, some cohesive devices are used in a slightly mechanical way, and there are minor issues with referencing, such as the use of 'these company' instead of 'this company'. Despite these minor slips, the progression of ideas is clear, and the overall structure of the letter is logical and easy to follow.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'tenure', 'procurement', and 'supply chain operation'. There are some instances of word-choice errors, such as 'these letter' instead of 'this letter' and 'quite' instead of 'quiet'. Additionally, 'having less stocks' is slightly unnatural; 'insufficient stock' would be more precise. While you attempt to use more sophisticated vocabulary, some inaccuracies persist. To improve, focus on collocations and ensure that pluralization and determiners are used correctly to enhance the precision of your writing.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

You use a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While the meaning is always clear, there are frequent grammatical errors, particularly with subject-verb agreement and pluralization, such as 'these letter', 'this problems', and 'manage there supply chain'. Some sentences are slightly awkward, such as 'all of this learning will help me to reach further'. While these errors do not impede communication, they occur frequently enough to prevent a higher score. Increasing your control over basic grammatical rules and proofreading for small errors would significantly improve your accuracy.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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