Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-08-05

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

 

You started in your present job two years ago. You now feel it is important for your career development to move to a different department in the same company.

Write a letter to your manager. In your letter

• say what you have learned in your present job
• suggest how the company would benefit from moving you to a different department
• explain why you do not wish to leave the company

You do NOT need to write any addresses.

Begin your letter as follows:

Dear ....................................,

Student answer (Band 6.5)

Dear Joanne,

I am writing to show my keen interest in the position of supervisor of administrative assistant. I have been working here as a customer service representative from last two years and I am very proud of myself that I have learned numerous of things and skills by doing this job.

I am honed in my communication skills along with performing any difficult task of administrative level. Not only I have learned to work as a leader in team work, but also I consider myself proficient in computer skills such as MS office, excel and all other platforms which we use in our daily work routine.

If I get the chance to be at the position of supervisor, I will be thrilled to assist the company to generate more revenue with my leadership qualities. Besides this, I will fill the work environment with enthusiasm which will lead to reduce the sick leaves of employees.

I consider myself very honored to be a part of such a wonderful workplace that I do not wish to leave. Another reason of not quitting is that I live nearby, and my husband is also an employee of this business. So, I want to remain here by getting promotion internally.

I hope you will consider my request and I look forward to your prompt response.

Yours sincerely

Simranjeet Kaur

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 7.0

The letter addresses all three bullet points of the prompt effectively. You clearly state what you have learned, suggest how the company would benefit from your move, and explain your reasons for staying. The tone is appropriate for a formal business letter. However, the development of ideas could be more sophisticated. For instance, the suggestion that you will 'reduce the sick leaves of employees' is a bit vague and could be better supported with more professional reasoning. Overall, the purpose of the letter is clear and the response is well-focused on the task requirements.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 7.0

The letter is logically organized with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a closing. Each paragraph focuses on a specific point from the prompt, which helps the reader follow your argument. You use some cohesive devices like 'Not only... but also' and 'Besides this' to link ideas. However, some transitions feel slightly mechanical, and the flow between sentences could be smoother. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate the different requirements of the task, which contributes to the overall coherence of the letter.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'keen interest', 'proficient', and 'leadership qualities'. There are some minor errors in word choice and collocation, such as 'numerous of things' (should be 'numerous things' or 'a number of things') and 'honed in my communication skills' (should be 'honed my communication skills'). While you attempt to use more formal language, some phrasing is slightly unnatural. Expanding your range of collocations and refining your use of prepositions would help you reach a higher band score.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

You use a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, which is good. However, there are several grammatical errors throughout the text. For example, 'from last two years' should be 'for the last two years', and 'at the position of supervisor' is better expressed as 'in the position of supervisor'. There are also minor issues with article usage and verb tense consistency. While these errors do not impede communication, they occur frequently enough to prevent a higher score. Focusing on subject-verb agreement and correct preposition usage will improve your accuracy.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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