Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-08-05

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

 

You started in your present job two years ago. You now feel it is important for your career development to move to a different department in the same company.

Write a letter to your manager. In your letter

• say what you have learned in your present job
• suggest how the company would benefit from moving you to a different department
• explain why you do not wish to leave the company

You do NOT need to write any addresses.

Begin your letter as follows:

Dear ....................................,

Student answer (Band 6.5)

Dear Mr. Carlos,

I am writing this letter to discuss about my future goals in this company, since it is been two years I am working in this role.

Firstly, I would like to thank you and the organization to gave me the opportunity to be the member of this company. I learnt all the administrative work from your guidance as this was my first job and you really helped me to succeed in this job. You made me feel confident to coordinate with the clients and boosted my confidence.

As you know, I recently completed my Masters in Human Resources. This studies gave me a good knowledge of the HR department. I recently came across the job posting of our company of HR role and I want to apply for this position. It will be easy for the company also as I am aware of the company work culture rather than appointing a new person and training them will take time and I easily can fit into the role.

I feel very proud to be a part of this company and I really like the work culture here. All the management and colleagues are very professional and cooperative that I love to continue to be the part of the same company.

I sincerely hope that you will consider my request. Looking forward to hear from you.

Yours faithfully

John Smith

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 7.0

The letter successfully addresses all three bullet points required by the prompt. You clearly explain what you have learned in your current role, suggest how the company benefits from your internal transfer, and express your commitment to the organization. The tone is appropriate for a formal business letter. To reach a higher band, ensure that your ideas are slightly more developed; for instance, when mentioning the benefits to the company, you could elaborate on how your existing knowledge of company culture specifically aids the HR department's efficiency. Overall, the purpose of the letter is clear and the requirements are fully met.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 7.0

The letter is logically organized with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a closing. Each paragraph focuses on a specific aspect of the prompt, which helps the reader follow your argument easily. You use some cohesive devices such as 'Firstly', 'As you know', and 'I feel very proud', which help to link your ideas. However, the transition between some sentences could be smoother. To improve, try to use a wider variety of linking words and ensure that the progression of ideas within paragraphs is more tightly connected to avoid a slightly mechanical feel.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'administrative work', 'coordinate', 'professional', and 'cooperative'. There are some minor inaccuracies, such as 'This studies gave me' (should be 'These studies gave me') and 'appointing a new person' (hiring is more standard in this context). While the vocabulary is sufficient to convey your meaning clearly, it lacks the sophistication and precision required for a higher band. Incorporating more precise business-related collocations would enhance your score.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

You use a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. However, there are several grammatical errors that occur throughout the text, such as 'it is been two years I am working' (should be 'it has been two years since I started working'), 'thank you... to gave me' (should be 'for giving me'), and 'I easily can fit' (should be 'I can easily fit'). While these errors do not impede communication, they are frequent enough to prevent a higher score. Focusing on subject-verb agreement and correct verb tense usage will significantly improve your accuracy.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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