Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-08-06
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
You started in your present job two years ago. You now feel it is important for your career development to move to a different department in the same company.
Write a letter to your manager. In your letter
- say what you have learned in your present job
- suggest how the company would benefit from moving you to a different department
- explain why you do not wish to leave the company
You do NOT need to write any addresses.
Begin your letter as follows:
Dear ....................................,
Student answer (Band 5.0)
dear manager,
I hope you are doing well. I started my job 2 years ago. I fell it is very important for my career development to a different department in same company. I learn so many things during my job like its boost my confident, how to work with different people , how to work with team. its very helpful to me from moving to a different department. I learn lots of things which I mentioned that. its increased my knowledge , how to do work from one department to another department. I want to stay this department because all are so friendly, polite and understanding staff.
yours thankful
Sukhmanpreet kaur
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 4.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 4.0
The response fails to meet the minimum word count requirement of 150 words, which significantly impacts the development of the required points. While you have attempted to address all three bullet points, the ideas are underdeveloped and repetitive. For instance, the explanation of what you have learned is vague, and the suggestion regarding company benefits is not clearly articulated. To improve, you must expand on your specific skills and provide a more professional justification for the transfer. The letter also lacks a formal structure, such as a proper opening and closing, which is essential for a formal request to a manager.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0
The letter lacks logical progression and paragraphing. The ideas are presented in a single, disjointed block, making it difficult for the reader to follow your argument. There is a lack of cohesive devices; you rely on simple sentence structures and repetitive phrasing like 'I learn' and 'how to'. To achieve a higher band, you should use linking words such as 'furthermore', 'consequently', or 'in addition' to connect your ideas and organize your letter into clear paragraphs: an introduction, body paragraphs for each bullet point, and a formal conclusion.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
The vocabulary is very limited and repetitive. You frequently use basic words like 'things', 'work', and 'good'. There are also errors in word choice and collocation, such as 'its boost my confident' (should be 'it boosted my confidence') and 'I want to stay this department' (should be 'I want to stay in this department'). To improve, you need to use a wider range of professional vocabulary related to career development and workplace skills. Avoid informal phrasing and focus on using more precise nouns and verbs to describe your professional experience.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
There are frequent grammatical errors throughout the text that occasionally impede clarity. Examples include subject-verb agreement issues ('I learn so many things' instead of 'I have learned'), incorrect tense usage ('I started my job 2 years ago' is fine, but subsequent sentences lack consistent tense), and missing articles or prepositions ('to a different department' instead of 'to move to a different department'). The sentence structures are predominantly simple, with very few attempts at complex sentences. You should focus on mastering basic sentence construction, including correct verb tenses and the proper use of articles and prepositions.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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