Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-08-09

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

 

You started in your present job two years ago. You now feel it is important for your career development to move to a different department in the same company.

Write a letter to your manager. In your letter

• say what you have learned in your present job
• suggest how the company would benefit from moving you to a different department
• explain why you do not wish to leave the company

You do NOT need to write any addresses.

Begin your letter as follows:

Dear ....................................,

Student answer (Band 6.5)

Dear manager,

I am writing to request a promotion to Clinical research department from my current position. This is because I recently graduated in Clinical research field, hence providing an opportunity to work in Research department would be a crucial step for my career development.

Being a long-lasting employee at our company in Quality assurance department, I have gained valuable skills such as team-work and collaboration, experience required for this position. In addition, I have learned other skills such as communication and interpersonal skills which is required for team work in order to improve productivity.

As mentioned earlier graduating from that particular field would assist me to apply my theoretical knowledge and skills in practical approach. Ultimately I would be delighted to apply my knowledge from QA department to Clinical research which will help a Clinical department to overcome challenges in better way. I would like to continue my career at this company because it provides more opportunities for recent graduates to work in different department. And also organization compensates more compared to other companies in the city. I hope you will consider my request to change department. Yours faithfully,

Mark.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.5

The letter covers all three bullet points required by the prompt. You clearly state what you have learned in your current role, explain the benefits of your transfer, and provide reasons for wanting to stay with the company. However, the development of these ideas is somewhat limited. For instance, while you mention 'team-work' and 'communication,' these points could be expanded with specific examples of projects or achievements to make your case more persuasive. The tone is generally appropriate for a formal letter, though the opening 'Dear manager' is slightly informal; 'Dear [Manager's Name]' or 'Dear Hiring Manager' would be more professional.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5

The letter follows a logical structure, with each paragraph addressing a specific requirement of the task. You use some cohesive devices such as 'In addition,' 'As mentioned earlier,' and 'Ultimately,' which help the flow of ideas. However, the transition between some sentences feels a bit mechanical, and the paragraphing is slightly inconsistent in terms of spacing. The use of referencing is generally clear, but the overall progression of ideas could be smoother if you used a wider variety of linking words to connect your professional background more fluidly to your future goals.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'professional development,' 'interpersonal skills,' and 'productivity.' However, there are some inaccuracies in word choice and collocation. For example, 'long-lasting employee' is not a standard collocation; 'long-term employee' would be more natural. Similarly, 'organization compensates more' is slightly awkward; 'the company offers a more competitive salary' would be more precise. While the vocabulary is sufficient to convey your meaning, it lacks the precision and sophistication required for a higher band score.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

You use a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, such as 'I am writing to request...' and 'This is because I recently graduated...'. There are several grammatical errors, such as missing articles ('to Clinical research department' should be 'to the Clinical Research department') and subject-verb agreement issues ('skills... which is required' should be 'which are required'). Punctuation is generally functional, but there are some minor errors in sentence construction. While these errors do not impede communication, they occur frequently enough to prevent a higher score.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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