Band 8.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 8.5 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-08-10

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

 

You started in your present job two years ago. You now feel it is important for your career development to move to a different department in the same company.

Write a letter to your manager. In your letter

  • say what you have learned in your present job
  • suggest how the company would benefit from moving you to a different department
  • explain why you do not wish to leave the company

You do NOT need to write any addresses.

Begin your letter as follows:

Dear ....................................,

Student answer (Band 8.5)

Dear Sir/Madam,

I am writing to request a transfer to a different department within the company, as I believe this would be an important step in my professional development.

I have been working in the Sales Department for the past two years, during which I have gained valuable experience in dealing with customers, handling complaints, preparing sales reports and working effectively as part of a team. I have also developed strong communication and problem-solving skills, which I believe would be useful in another department.

I would particularly appreciate the opportunity to move to the Marketing Department. My experience in sales has given me a good understanding of customer needs and market trends, so I believe I could contribute effectively to marketing projects. Furthermore, my transfer would allow the company to benefit from my existing knowledge while also giving me an opportunity to develop new skills. This could ultimately make me a more versatile and productive employee.

However, I would like to emphasise that I have no intention of leaving the company. I have greatly valued the supportive working environment and the opportunities I have been given here. I am proud to be part of the organisation and would prefer to continue developing my career within the company rather than seeking opportunities elsewhere.

I would be grateful if you could consider my request and discuss the possibility of transferring me to the Marketing Department.

Yours sincerely,

Bella

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response8.5
Coherence and Cohesion8.5
Lexical Resource8.0
Grammatical Range and Accuracy8.5
Overall8.5

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 8.5

The response fully addresses all three bullet points of the prompt. You clearly outline the skills gained in your current role, such as 'handling complaints' and 'preparing sales reports'. You also provide a logical justification for how the company would benefit from your transfer to the Marketing Department, specifically citing your understanding of 'customer needs and market trends'. Furthermore, you effectively explain your desire to remain with the company by highlighting your appreciation for the 'supportive working environment'. The tone is consistently professional and appropriate for a formal business letter. All parts of the task are well-developed and the purpose of the letter is clear from the outset.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 8.5

The letter is logically organized with a clear progression of ideas. Each paragraph focuses on a specific aspect of the prompt, moving smoothly from your current experience to your proposed transfer and finally to your commitment to the company. You use a variety of cohesive devices effectively, such as 'Furthermore', 'However', and 'during which', which help to connect your ideas seamlessly. The paragraphing is appropriate, and the overall structure follows a standard, professional letter format. The flow of information is natural and easy to follow throughout the entire response.

Lexical Resource — Band 8.0

You demonstrate a wide and precise range of vocabulary appropriate for a professional context. Phrases such as 'professional development', 'valuable experience', 'contribute effectively', and 'versatile and productive employee' show a high level of lexical control. The language is natural and sophisticated, with no noticeable errors in word choice or collocation. You successfully use topic-specific vocabulary related to business and career progression, which enhances the overall quality of the writing. The vocabulary is used with flexibility and precision, fitting the requirements of a formal request letter perfectly.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 8.5

The response displays a wide range of grammatical structures with a high degree of accuracy. You use complex sentences effectively, such as 'My experience in sales has given me a good understanding of customer needs and market trends, so I believe I could contribute effectively to marketing projects.' Punctuation is used correctly throughout, and there are no grammatical errors that impede communication. The control over verb tenses and sentence construction is excellent, reflecting a high level of proficiency. The writing is error-free, and the structures used are varied and sophisticated.

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