Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-08-10
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
You started in your present job two years ago. You now feel it is important for your career development to move to a different department in the same company.
Write a letter to your manager. In your letter
- say what you have learned in your present job
- suggest how the company would benefit from moving you to a different department
- explain why you do not wish to leave the company
You do NOT need to write any addresses.
Begin your letter as follows:
Dear ....................................,
Student answer (Band 6.5)
Dear Manager,
I hope you are doing well. I am writing to express my interest to switch the department internally as we have a new openings in Signaling department.
I am delighted to be the part of maintenance department where I gained extensive knowledge about the service and all the components used in the vehicle. Since beginning I have keen interest of knowing the working functionality of the Light Rail Vehicle.
Further I am eager to learn about the communication and and data management as I have done some courses during my academic period. My shift towards the signaling department would be beneficial for myself as well as to the company, as I can learn new skills and utilize them to solve the complex problems.
I wish to stay in our organization only as our company gave me the opportunity to grow in my career. In return, I can contribute my knowledge towards achieving company's success and goal.
I would appreciate if you could look into my request and help me through your guidance.
Yours faithfully,
Urvesh Shah
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 7.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 6.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 6.0 |
| Overall | 6.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 7.0
The letter addresses all three bullet points required by the prompt. You clearly state what you have learned in your current role, explain the benefits of your transfer to the company, and express your desire to remain within the organization. The tone is appropriate for a formal letter to a manager. To reach a higher band, ensure that your ideas are more fully developed; for instance, when mentioning the benefits to the company, providing a more specific example of how your academic background in data management would solve a particular problem would strengthen your argument.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5
The letter is logically organized with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a formal closing. Each paragraph focuses on a specific requirement of the prompt. You use some cohesive devices such as 'Further' and 'In return' to link ideas. However, the flow could be improved by using a wider variety of linking words and ensuring that transitions between sentences are smoother. Some sentences feel slightly disjointed, and the use of 'and and' in the third paragraph is a minor mechanical error that disrupts the flow.
Lexical Resource — Band 6.0
You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'extensive knowledge', 'maintenance department', and 'signaling department'. There are some minor inaccuracies in word choice, such as 'interest to switch' (should be 'interest in switching') and 'the part of' (should be 'part of'). While the vocabulary is sufficient to convey your meaning clearly, it lacks the precision and sophistication required for higher bands. Expanding your use of collocations and more precise professional terminology would improve your score.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0
You use a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While your meaning is generally clear, there are several grammatical errors, such as 'as we have a new openings' (article error), 'Since beginning I have keen interest' (missing subject/article), and 'communication and and data management' (repetition). These errors do not impede communication, but they occur frequently enough to prevent a higher score. Focusing on subject-verb agreement, article usage, and proofreading for minor slips will help improve your accuracy.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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