Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-08-10

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

 

You started in your present job two years ago. You now feel it is important for your career development to move to a different department in the same company.

Write a letter to your manager. In your letter

• say what you have learned in your present job
• suggest how the company would benefit from moving you to a different department
• explain why you do not wish to leave the company

You do NOT need to write any addresses.

Begin your letter as follows:

Dear ....................................,

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Dear Manager,

I am writing this letter to inform to you that I have completed two years in this company and I want to move in different department for my growth and development.

I started this job as a senior manager two years ago. Now I have good knowledge about everthing and I have few skills like team lead, how to present our company with others and many more. From the past few months I am learning "MBA with HR" to develop my knowledge as well as my career options. This can be benefit our company to hire appropriate Individuals without any bias. After completing this course I would like to move in HR department for training and after training session ends I am ready to be an HR. I do not want to leave this compnay because this company taught so much in terms of how to handle a whole team, representation of any products and so on.

I hope you will understand my situation and help me to grow in this company and develop my career.

Best regards,

Krish

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The letter covers all three bullet points required by the prompt. You clearly state what you have learned, explain the benefits of your transfer to the company, and provide reasons for wanting to stay. However, the development of these ideas is somewhat limited. For example, the explanation of how the company would benefit from your move to HR is a bit brief and could be expanded with more specific details about how your current skills would translate to that department. The tone is generally appropriate for a formal letter to a manager, though it could be slightly more professional in its phrasing.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The letter is organized into logical paragraphs, which helps the reader follow your points. However, the use of cohesive devices is quite limited and sometimes mechanical. For instance, you rely heavily on simple sentence structures and lack a variety of linking words to connect your ideas more fluidly. Phrases like 'and many more' and 'and so on' are informal and do not contribute to a cohesive flow. To improve, try using transition words such as 'furthermore,' 'consequently,' or 'in addition' to better connect your sentences and paragraphs.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

Your vocabulary is adequate for the task, but it lacks the range and precision expected at higher bands. You use some repetitive phrasing, such as 'this company' and 'my career.' There are also some minor errors in word choice, such as 'move in different department' (should be 'move to a different department') and 'this can be benefit' (should be 'this would benefit'). To achieve a higher score, try to incorporate more specific professional terminology related to career development and human resources, and pay closer attention to collocations.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

You demonstrate a mix of simple and some complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors throughout the text. Examples include 'inform to you' (should be 'inform you'), 'completed two years in this company' (should be 'been with this company for two years'), and 'move in HR department' (should be 'move to the HR department'). While these errors do not prevent the reader from understanding your message, they are frequent enough to impact the overall fluency of your writing. Focusing on subject-verb agreement and correct preposition usage will help improve your accuracy.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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