Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-08-11

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

 

You started in your present job two years ago. You now feel it is important for your career development to move to a different department in the same company.

Write a letter to your manager. In your letter

• say what you have learned in your present job
• suggest how the company would benefit from moving you to a different department
• explain why you do not wish to leave the company

You do NOT need to write any addresses.

Begin your letter as follows:

Dear ....................................,

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Dear Rajiv Vyas,

I hope you are doing well, I am writing this letter to put my views in front of you regarding my position. Actually, being a loyal employee of your marketing company for 2 years now, I have gained extensive experience in almost every part of my job duties. I vividly remember, at the beginning it was quite hard for me to manage and perform certain tasks like management, data entry and manymore. But, with time and conistency, I have learned everything like time management, data entry, CCA, java, supervising, and some managerial duties too.

Moreover, I am capable of managing and guiding new trainees whenever required. So, basically, company wants to hire a new permanet boss to lead the business. However, hiring a new person and teaching him/her from the beginning would be a difficult task and also it will waste company's precious time. As, this job is located near my house and I am very interested to work with you for atleast 6 or 7 years. If you wish, you can set a interview before taking any steps. Hoping for a positive response from your side.

Yours faithfully,

Vraj Patel

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

You have addressed all three bullet points in the prompt. You mentioned your learning experiences, suggested how the company would benefit from your transfer, and explained your desire to stay. However, the development of these ideas is somewhat uneven. The explanation of how the company benefits is a bit vague, as you focus more on the difficulty of hiring a new person rather than the specific value you would bring to the new department. Additionally, the tone is slightly informal for a formal request to a manager. To reach a higher band, ensure that your arguments are more clearly linked to the company's strategic interests rather than just personal convenience.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The letter is organized into logical paragraphs, which helps the reader follow your points. You use some cohesive devices like 'Moreover' and 'However' to connect ideas. However, the flow between sentences is occasionally mechanical. For example, the transition between your skills and the suggestion of a new boss is abrupt. The use of referencing could also be improved; for instance, in the second paragraph, the phrase 'company wants to hire a new permanent boss' is a bit confusing as it is unclear if this is a fact or an assumption. Improving the variety of linking words would enhance the overall flow.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'extensive experience', 'consistency', and 'managerial duties'. However, there are some spelling errors ('conistency', 'permanet') and minor word choice issues, such as 'put my views in front of you', which is not standard professional English. While you successfully communicate your meaning, the vocabulary lacks the precision and sophistication required for higher bands. To improve, focus on using more professional collocations and ensuring accurate spelling of key business-related terms.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

You use a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, which is appropriate for this task. There are several grammatical slips, such as 'at the beginning it was quite hard' (missing 'that'), 'manymore' (should be two words), and 'set a interview' (should be 'an interview'). Punctuation is generally functional, though there is a comma splice in the first sentence ('I hope you are doing well, I am writing...'). While these errors do not impede communication, they occur frequently enough to prevent a higher score. Focusing on subject-verb agreement and article usage will help improve your accuracy.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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