Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-08-11

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

 

You started in your present job two years ago. You now feel it is important for your career development to move to a different department in the same company.

Write a letter to your manager. In your letter

• say what you have learned in your present job
• suggest how the company would benefit from moving you to a different department
• explain why you do not wish to leave the company

You do NOT need to write any addresses.

Begin your letter as follows:

Dear ....................................,

Student answer (Band 6.5)

Dear Mr. Smith,

I am writing to eagerly express my interest towards my future goals within our organization. Throughout my two-years of exceptional journey as a theory apprentice, I have been continuously developing my much needed technical, mechanical, intellectual and interpersonal skills; contributing towards my overall development.

Since I have recently completed my Electromechanical Degree by achieving High Honors, I would like to internally apply for the position of Maintenance Technician and transfer to our Facilities department. This opportunity will not only enable myself to progress inside the mechanical field, but also I will have the opportunity to gain the hands-on experience essential for the licensing purposes.

Over the past two-year, I have successfully built gentle relations with all the colleagues along with the leadership team; by helping them in multitasking, thus enabling them to finish tasks within deadlines. Apart from this, I am greatly satisfied with the company paid benefits such as Paid Time Off and company bonuses. Therefore, I ought not to search outside the company for such postings.

Thank you for your time and kind consideration. I look forward to receiving your response promptly.

Yours Sincerely,

Simanpreet Singh

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 7.0

The letter successfully addresses all three bullet points required by the prompt. You clearly state what you have learned, explain the benefits of your transfer to the company, and provide a valid reason for wanting to stay. The tone is appropriate for a formal business letter. To reach a higher band, ensure that your ideas are slightly more developed; for example, when mentioning the benefits to the company, you could provide a more specific example of how your new skills would directly improve the Facilities department's efficiency.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 7.0

The letter is logically organized with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a closing. Paragraphing is used effectively to separate the different requirements of the task. You use some cohesive devices such as 'Apart from this' and 'Therefore', which help the flow of the text. However, some transitions feel slightly mechanical. To improve, try to vary your linking phrases and ensure that the relationship between sentences is always smooth and natural.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.5

You demonstrate a good range of vocabulary, such as 'intellectual', 'interpersonal', and 'exceptional'. However, there are some minor collocation errors, such as 'built gentle relations' (should be 'built good/strong professional relationships') and 'company paid benefits' (should be 'company-paid benefits'). The phrase 'theory apprentice' is also slightly unclear in this context. Focusing on more natural collocations and precise terminology related to your field will help you achieve a higher score.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

You use a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, which is good. There are some grammatical slips, such as 'two-years of exceptional journey' (should be 'two-year journey') and 'enable myself' (should be 'enable me'). Additionally, 'I ought not to search' is slightly unnatural in this formal context; 'I have no desire to look' would be better. While these errors do not impede communication, they occur frequently enough to prevent a higher band score. Focus on subject-verb agreement and correct preposition usage.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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