Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-08-11
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
You started in your present job two years ago. You now feel it is important for your career development to move to a different department in the same company.
Write a letter to your manager. In your letter
- say what you have learned in your present job
- suggest how the company would benefit from moving you to a different department
- explain why you do not wish to leave the company
You do NOT need to write any addresses.
Begin your letter as follows:
Dear ....................................,
Student answer (Band 6.0)
Dear Pardeep,
I hope you are doing well.
I am pleased to inform you that I have completed human Resources course while working in your company as a receptionist.
Yesterday, I noticed that there is a HR job posting on the notice board. I was really happy to know that freshers can also apply this position.
Actually, I want to upgrade my position However, I have learned several skills while working at reception such as communication, problem solving and attending multiple calls at a time.
In addition, I have been working here for 5 years, and familiar with rules and regulations of this company. It would be better for me and the company as well.
Furthermore, this place gave me opportunity to study while I was working as a full time employee. I would like to work with this place, and definitely put my efforts to grow here.
I have attached my resume below, let me know if you need any other information.
I look forward to hearing from you soon.
Yours trustworthy,
Rajvir
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 6.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 6.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0
The letter addresses all three bullet points required by the prompt. You clearly state what you have learned as a receptionist, explain the benefits of your transfer to the HR department, and express your desire to remain with the company. However, the development of these points is somewhat basic. For instance, while you mention skills like 'problem solving,' you could have elaborated on how these specific skills would translate effectively to an HR role. The tone is generally appropriate for a formal letter, though the transition between the introduction and the body paragraphs could be smoother to ensure a more professional impact.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0
The letter is organized into logical paragraphs, which helps the reader follow your intent. You use some cohesive devices such as 'In addition' and 'Furthermore' to link your ideas. However, the flow is occasionally interrupted by abrupt sentence structures. For example, the transition between 'Actually, I want to upgrade my position' and the following sentence is slightly disjointed due to a missing conjunction or punctuation. The use of referencing is generally clear, but the overall progression of ideas could be improved by using a wider variety of linking words to connect your professional history with your future goals more fluidly.
Lexical Resource — Band 6.0
You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'human Resources course,' 'job posting,' and 'rules and regulations.' There are some minor errors in word choice, such as 'apply this position' (should be 'apply for this position') and 'work with this place' (which sounds unnatural; 'work for this company' would be better). While the vocabulary is sufficient to convey your meaning, it lacks the precision and variety required for a higher band score. Attempting to use more sophisticated collocations related to professional development would enhance your writing.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
You use a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. There are several grammatical errors, such as 'I have completed human Resources course' (missing an article) and 'familiar with rules' (missing the subject 'I am'). Punctuation is also inconsistent, particularly the lack of a full stop before 'However' in the third paragraph. While these errors do not impede communication, they occur frequently enough to prevent a higher score. To improve, focus on subject-verb agreement and the correct use of articles, as well as ensuring that complex sentences are punctuated correctly to maintain clarity.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.