Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-08-12

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

 

You started in your present job two years ago. You now feel it is important for your career development to move to a different department in the same company.

Write a letter to your manager. In your letter

• say what you have learned in your present job
• suggest how the company would benefit from moving you to a different department
• explain why you do not wish to leave the company

You do NOT need to write any addresses.

Begin your letter as follows:

Dear ....................................,

Student answer (Band 6.5)

Dear Marion,

Iam writing to request in switch of the department. Its a pleasure to be part of this wonderful organization. As you know i am working with the firm since past 2 years, i have learned a lot here. When i started two years ago i was just working as a accounts payable & receivable clerk where i learned to be meticulous with payments, not missing the deadlines. By following up on payments, i learned communication skills. Later last year i took over book keeping for the company, which im doing currently. I got excellent knowledge while working as a book keeper. I also learned about taxes and payroll. This role was great boost in my career.

I have started with my CPA last year which will complete in another six months. Iam learning the financials statements preparations, reporting, auditing. I have notice our career site that there would be open position for Financial analyst so i would like you consider me moving that department. My course and experience can benefit the company as i have been working in the company since 2 years, rather than hiring someone new.

I do not wish to leave the company due to the positive work culture it offers, also if i have career boost within the company i rather take it than to find somewhere else.

Hope you will consider me for this role.

Regards

Shabnam

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 7.0

You have successfully addressed all three bullet points in the prompt. You clearly outlined your experience as an accounts payable clerk and bookkeeper, explained the benefits of your transfer to the company, and provided a valid reason for wanting to stay. The tone is appropriate for a formal letter to a manager. To reach a higher band, ensure that your ideas are slightly more developed; for instance, you could elaborate on how your specific CPA studies would directly improve the efficiency of the Financial Analyst role. Overall, the response is well-focused and meets all requirements of the task.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5

The letter follows a logical structure, with clear paragraphing that separates your past experience, your future goals, and your reasons for staying. You use some cohesive devices such as 'Later last year' and 'As you know' to link ideas. However, the flow is occasionally interrupted by slightly repetitive sentence structures and some minor issues with referencing. To improve, try to use a wider variety of linking words and transition phrases to connect your sentences more fluidly, which would help the progression of your argument feel more natural and less mechanical.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using industry-specific terms like 'accounts payable', 'payroll', 'auditing', and 'financial statements'. While the vocabulary is sufficient to convey your meaning clearly, it remains somewhat basic. There are some minor errors in word choice, such as 'request in switch' (should be 'request a switch') and 'career boost' (which is slightly informal). To improve, try to incorporate more precise collocations and sophisticated professional terminology to elevate the tone of your writing.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

You use a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that slightly distract the reader. Common issues include missing articles ('the' accounts payable), incorrect verb tenses ('I am working' instead of 'I have been working'), and punctuation errors (e.g., 'Iam', 'i', 'im'). While these errors do not impede communication, they are frequent enough to prevent a higher score. Focusing on subject-verb agreement, consistent use of tenses, and proper capitalization will significantly improve the accuracy of your writing.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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