Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-08-12

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

 

You started in your present job two years ago. You now feel it is important for your career development to move to a different department in the same company.

Write a letter to your manager. In your letter

• say what you have learned in your present job
• suggest how the company would benefit from moving you to a different department
• explain why you do not wish to leave the company

You do NOT need to write any addresses.

Begin your letter as follows:

Dear ....................................,

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Dear company,

I would like to inform you that I started this job two years ago. I had seen in the company website that you looking for new member for the other department but I feel that it would be benefit for me in future to join that department.

I would to share that I had learned so many skills and qualities which can be used in any type of work. I learned how to manage all the staff and maintain the workplace decorum.

Through this company can also have benefit from moving me to other department because I know all the staff and duties which can work and letting me in this job they can also save their time by not giving extra hours pay for presentation. Lastly, I wish to not leave this company because I am having good relationships, understandings and trust which I feel more comfortable to be their as a family member.

I kindly request you to see my profile, connections with employees and duties through this I can get this department which can be helpful in securing future.

Yours respectfully,

Honey.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The letter covers all three bullet points required by the prompt: it mentions skills learned, suggests benefits to the company, and explains the desire to stay. However, the development of these ideas is somewhat limited and occasionally unclear. For instance, the explanation of how the company would benefit from your move is vague, specifically the mention of 'saving time by not giving extra hours pay for presentation.' The tone is also slightly inconsistent for a formal business letter, particularly the opening 'Dear company' and the phrasing 'letting me in this job.' To improve, ensure that the benefits to the company are articulated with more professional clarity and that the tone remains consistently formal throughout.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The letter is organized into paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the structure. There is a logical progression from the introduction to the specific points requested. However, the use of cohesive devices is somewhat mechanical and occasionally awkward, such as 'Through this company can also have benefit' and 'through this I can get this department.' The referencing is sometimes unclear, making the flow between sentences feel a bit disjointed. To reach a higher band, focus on using a wider variety of linking words and phrases to connect ideas more naturally and ensure that pronouns clearly refer back to their intended antecedents.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, allowing the message to be understood. However, there is a lack of precision and some awkward collocations, such as 'maintain the workplace decorum' and 'giving extra hours pay.' The range is somewhat limited, relying on basic phrasing to express professional concepts. To improve, try to incorporate more specific business-related terminology and ensure that word choices are natural in a professional context. For example, instead of 'I had learned so many skills,' consider using 'I have acquired a diverse range of professional competencies.'

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The letter contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede the flow of reading. Examples include 'you looking for' (missing auxiliary verb), 'it would be benefit' (incorrect word form), and 'I wish to not leave' (awkward word order). Subject-verb agreement and tense consistency are also areas that require attention, such as 'I am having good relationships' instead of 'I have built good relationships.' While the meaning is generally clear, the frequency of these errors prevents the writing from reaching a higher band. Focusing on basic sentence construction and proofreading for tense consistency will be very beneficial.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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