Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-08-12

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

 

You started in your present job two years ago. You now feel it is important for your career development to move to a different department in the same company.

Write a letter to your manager. In your letter

• say what you have learned in your present job
• suggest how the company would benefit from moving you to a different department
• explain why you do not wish to leave the company

You do NOT need to write any addresses.

Begin your letter as follows:

Dear ....................................,

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Dear manager

I hope this Email finds. you well

I am writing this email to express my interest in Front of house manager , since I am working as supervisor for approximately 2 years now . Thus, I am planning to move to some other role so that I can learn more about that; but it won't be possible without your support .

Moreover, I am so grateful that in this department I have gained the management skills like , time management , team work and so on . However, as the vacancy is listed I am very excited to do front house as that was my main goal before joining this company .

Therefore, I do not wish to leave this company as I truly love working here , I feel I am valued here my opinions matters here so please support me to transfer to another department , I will be sad to leave you but I know you always encouraged me for my future as you will be so proud .

Thank you

Ritika

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The letter covers all three bullet points: it mentions skills learned (management, teamwork), explains the benefits of the move (alignment with career goals), and expresses a desire to stay with the company. However, the development of these ideas is somewhat limited. For example, the explanation of how the company would benefit from your move is quite vague; it focuses more on your personal goals than on the value you would bring to the new department. To improve, you should provide more specific details about how your current experience would translate into success in the new role.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The letter is organized into clear paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the structure. You use some cohesive devices like 'Moreover', 'However', and 'Therefore' to link ideas. However, some of these transitions feel a bit mechanical or are used slightly incorrectly in context. Additionally, the flow between sentences is occasionally interrupted by punctuation errors, such as the unnecessary period in 'finds. you well'. Improving the variety of linking words and ensuring they are used naturally would help the overall progression of your argument.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, allowing you to communicate your message clearly. You use some relevant professional terms like 'vacancy', 'department', and 'management skills'. However, the range is somewhat limited, and there are some awkward phrasings, such as 'do front house' instead of 'work in the front-of-house department'. To reach a higher band, try to incorporate more precise professional collocations and avoid repetitive phrasing like 'I feel I am valued here' and 'my opinions matters here'.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

You demonstrate a mix of simple and some complex sentence structures. However, there are frequent errors in punctuation and grammar that occasionally distract the reader. Examples include the incorrect placement of periods ('finds. you'), missing articles ('as supervisor'), and subject-verb agreement issues ('my opinions matters'). While these errors do not prevent the reader from understanding your intent, they occur frequently enough to impact the overall fluency of the text. Focusing on proofreading for basic sentence structure and punctuation will significantly improve your score.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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