Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-08-15

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

 

You started in your present job two years ago. You now feel it is important for your career development to move to a different department in the same company.

Write a letter to your manager. In your letter

• say what you have learned in your present job
• suggest how the company would benefit from moving you to a different department
• explain why you do not wish to leave the company

You do NOT need to write any addresses.

Begin your letter as follows:

Dear ....................................,

Student answer (Band 6.5)

Dear Marc,

I hope this message finds you well. I am writing this letter to express my interest in working as an outside sales rep for our maritime region.

I have really enjoyed my time in the company by working as an Inside sales rep for Dartmouth branch.From the beginning, you have assisted me in improving my product knowledge and took a stand for me when I was struggling to hit our quarterky targets. I can't be thankful enough to work under a strong leader like you.

Since i am confident enough to meet and undrestand the demand of our local sign shops , I can assure that promoting me as an outside sales rep would help the company to maintain the positive relationship with our clients .Additonally, It can play a cruical role in increasing the opportunities which can assist to generate more revenue for our branch.

Since, i am about to complete 3 years with Grimco, i am not intrested in finding any other company who are offering the same role and I can see myself performing well as an outside sales rep for our company.

I would really appreciate if you accept my request.

Your's truel

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 7.5

The letter successfully addresses all three bullet points required by the prompt. You clearly state what you have learned, explain the benefits to the company of your potential move, and express your commitment to the organization. The tone is appropriate for a professional request to a manager. The ideas are relevant and well-developed, providing a clear rationale for your request. To reach a higher band, ensure that the connection between your current skills and the new role is even more explicitly linked to the company's specific goals, but overall, the task is fully satisfied.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 7.0

The letter is logically organized with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a closing. Each paragraph focuses on a specific requirement of the prompt, which aids readability. You use some cohesive devices such as 'Additionally' and 'Since', though the flow could be improved with more varied transition words. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate distinct ideas. The progression of ideas is clear, and the reader can easily follow your argument from your past experience to your future aspirations within the company.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

You demonstrate a sufficient range of vocabulary to convey your message clearly, such as 'product knowledge', 'quarterly targets', and 'generate more revenue'. However, there are several spelling errors (e.g., 'quarterky', 'undrestand', 'cruical', 'intrested') and minor word choice issues. While these do not impede communication, they prevent the response from reaching a higher band. To improve, focus on proofreading for common spelling mistakes and try to incorporate more sophisticated collocations to express your professional intentions more precisely.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

You use a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, such as 'Since I am confident enough to meet... I can assure that...'. However, there are frequent errors in punctuation and grammar, particularly with capitalization (e.g., 'i', 'Additonally'), missing articles, and the closing 'Your's truel'. While these errors do not prevent understanding, they are noticeable and occur throughout the text. To improve, pay closer attention to subject-verb agreement and basic punctuation rules, as these are essential for professional correspondence.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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