Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-08-16

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

 

You started in your present job two years ago. You now feel it is important for your career development to move to a different department in the same company.

Write a letter to your manager. In your letter

• say what you have learned in your present job
• suggest how the company would benefit from moving you to a different department
• explain why you do not wish to leave the company

You do NOT need to write any addresses.

Begin your letter as follows:

Dear ....................................,

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Dear manager,

I am writing this letter to inform you that in present I am working as a sales associate at Seven eleven in Canada since two year ago. Even I have learned various skills such as communication skills, leadership skills & how to work in a team and helps to make social contract with others.

It is essential in every company to promote their employees. As I worked for this company since two years and have knowledge about every product and even about company's security and privacy policy to follow rules and regulations. It is lucrative for the organization to transfer their employees who have great information regarding with written work such as pay rolls, stocking and other important tasks.

Due to company provide great customer services and health and safety benefits for the employees like dentist, bonus and discount on certain items. Therefore, i do not want to leave the company.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The letter addresses all three bullet points required by the prompt. You clearly state your current experience, explain the benefits of your transfer, and express your desire to remain with the company. However, the development of these ideas is somewhat limited. For example, while you mention 'communication skills' and 'leadership skills', these points are not elaborated upon to show how they would specifically add value to a new department. The tone is generally appropriate for a formal letter, though it occasionally slips into informal phrasing. To improve, ensure that your arguments are more fully extended with specific examples of how your skills would translate to a new role.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The letter is organized into three distinct paragraphs, which helps the reader follow your structure. However, the use of cohesive devices is somewhat mechanical and occasionally inaccurate. For instance, the transition 'Even I have learned' is unnatural, and the use of 'Therefore' at the start of the final paragraph does not logically connect to the preceding sentence about company benefits. Additionally, the referencing is sometimes unclear, such as in the phrase 'regarding with written work'. Improving the variety and accuracy of your linking words and ensuring that each paragraph has a clear, singular focus will help improve the flow of your writing.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'lucrative', 'organization', and 'regulations'. However, there are several instances of awkward word choice and collocation errors that hinder precision. For example, 'make social contract' is not standard English; 'build professional relationships' would be more appropriate. Similarly, 'in present' should be 'at present', and 'regarding with' is grammatically incorrect. While your meaning is generally clear, the vocabulary is somewhat repetitive and lacks the sophistication required for a higher band score. Focus on learning common collocations and ensuring that words are used in their correct context.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The response contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors throughout. Common issues include incorrect verb tenses (e.g., 'I am working... since two year ago' should be 'I have been working... for two years') and missing articles or incorrect prepositions. Punctuation is also inconsistent, particularly with the use of the ampersand (&), which should be avoided in formal letter writing. While these errors do not completely impede communication, they are frequent enough to distract the reader. You should focus on mastering basic tense consistency and subject-verb agreement to improve your accuracy.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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