Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-08-17

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

 

You started in your present job two years ago. You now feel it is important for your career development to move to a different department in the same company.

Write a letter to your manager. In your letter

• say what you have learned in your present job
• suggest how the company would benefit from moving you to a different department
• explain why you do not wish to leave the company

You do NOT need to write any addresses.

Begin your letter as follows:

Dear ....................................,

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Dear Lorry,

I hope you are doing awesome, I am writing this letter to inform you about my new career development. I really like to work in our company for long years and new role as head chef. I have 12 years of experience in chef and I am totally happy to take more responsibility and leadership role.

If I promoted as a headchef, this is my best turning point. I will do my level best duties in our restaurant .I can learn more about services , customer handling, food safety and maintaining good relationships with all front off house and kitchen staff.

If you are willing to give this opportunity, I will guarantee to not leave from here , and I will sign it a contract for next 5 years. This is not only a word but also for our business development and my career achievements. I promise you this will achieve our business goals and earnings.

Regards,

Mary Ann Williams.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The response addresses all three bullet points of the prompt, though the development of ideas is somewhat limited. You mention your experience and desire for a new role, explain the benefits to the company, and express your commitment to staying. However, the tone is slightly informal for a professional letter to a manager (e.g., 'I hope you are doing awesome'). To reach a higher band, ensure your ideas are more fully extended; for instance, specifically linking your current skills to the requirements of the new department would provide more depth. The focus on becoming a 'head chef' is clear, but the letter lacks a formal structure appropriate for a workplace request.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The letter is organized into short paragraphs, which helps the reader follow your points. However, the use of cohesive devices is quite mechanical and limited. Transitions between sentences are often abrupt, such as the jump from discussing your experience to the promotion request. The logical progression is present, but the flow could be improved by using a wider variety of linking words (e.g., 'furthermore', 'consequently', 'in addition to this'). Paragraphing is used, but the internal structure of the paragraphs feels a bit disjointed, which prevents a smoother reading experience.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

Your vocabulary is adequate for the task but lacks the precision and professional tone required for a formal business letter. Phrases like 'do my level best duties' and 'not only a word' are slightly unnatural or awkward in this context. You rely on basic vocabulary, and there are some minor errors in word choice, such as 'front off house' instead of 'front of house'. To improve, focus on using more professional collocations and business-appropriate terminology to convey your request more effectively and persuasively.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The response contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally distract the reader. Examples include 'I really like to work in our company for long years' (should be 'have enjoyed working'), 'If I promoted' (passive voice error: 'If I am promoted'), and 'I will sign it a contract' (unnecessary pronoun). While these errors do not completely impede communication, they are frequent enough to prevent a higher score. Focusing on subject-verb agreement and correct tense usage in conditional sentences will significantly improve your accuracy.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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