Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-08-18

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

 

You started in your present job two years ago. You now feel it is important for your career development to move to a different department in the same company.

Write a letter to your manager. In your letter

• say what you have learned in your present job
• suggest how the company would benefit from moving you to a different department
• explain why you do not wish to leave the company

You do NOT need to write any addresses.

Begin your letter as follows:

Dear ....................................,

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Dear sir,

I’m working in a data analytics department in this company for last two years. I’m writing you to inform about I want move in other department of this company.

I’m working as a accountant in this department for two years. I learned many accounting programme like tally, tax. Not only this I also learn to handle a data, how to store it and managing all kind of files. Now, I have decide to move in business administration department. Because after working for as two years I learned a lot of skills; however, I have ability to handle a team and take decision. Moreover, my knowledge is also increased this all skills help to company in large extent. As a working in your company from many years I know that I have a better opportunity in this place. which makes my career great. Furthermore, in this company I have a chance to meet a new people from other company from this I can adopt a new skills. So, I don’t have to plan to leave this company.

Looking forward to your answer.

Kind regards,

Dhruvi

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The letter addresses all three bullet points required by the prompt: what you have learned, the benefits to the company of your transfer, and your reasons for staying. However, the development of these ideas is somewhat limited. For instance, while you mention learning 'tally' and 'tax', the explanation of how the company would benefit from your move to business administration is a bit vague, relying on general statements like 'help to company in large extent'. To reach a higher band, you should provide more specific examples of how your current skills would translate into value for the new department. The tone is generally appropriate for a formal letter to a manager, though the structure could be more professional.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The letter is organised into paragraphs, which helps the reader follow your points. You use some cohesive devices such as 'Moreover', 'Furthermore', and 'However' to link ideas. However, the flow between sentences is sometimes mechanical, and the logical progression is occasionally interrupted by grammatical errors that make the relationships between ideas less clear. For example, the transition between discussing your skills and your desire to stay in the company is a bit abrupt. Improving the use of referencing (e.g., using 'this' or 'these' more precisely) and ensuring smoother transitions between sentences would improve the coherence of your writing.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The vocabulary used is adequate for the task but lacks variety and precision. You rely on basic terms like 'learned', 'skills', and 'great'. There are some inaccuracies in word choice, such as 'I’m working as a accountant' (should be 'an accountant') and 'my knowledge is also increased' (should be 'has increased'). You attempt to use some business-related terminology, but the phrasing is often slightly unnatural. To improve, focus on using more precise collocations and varied vocabulary related to professional development and workplace environments. Avoid repetitive sentence structures and try to incorporate more sophisticated synonyms for common verbs and adjectives.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0

There is a mix of simple and some attempts at complex sentence structures, but the accuracy is inconsistent. Frequent errors in articles ('a accountant', 'a data'), verb tenses ('I’m working... for last two years' should be 'I have been working'), and prepositions ('move in' should be 'move to') are present. While these errors do not completely impede communication, they are frequent enough to distract the reader. You need to focus on subject-verb agreement and the correct use of present perfect tenses for actions that started in the past and continue to the present. Strengthening your control over basic grammar will significantly improve your score.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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