Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-08-19

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

 

You started in your present job two years ago. You now feel it is important for your career development to move to a different department in the same company.

Write a letter to your manager. In your letter

• say what you have learned in your present job
• suggest how the company would benefit from moving you to a different department
• explain why you do not wish to leave the company

You do NOT need to write any addresses.

Begin your letter as follows:

Dear ....................................,

Student answer (Band 6.5)

Dear Mr Smith,

I am writing to request you to change my department from accounts to marketing as I have gained enough experience to work in during these two years since I have started working your company.

Particularly, my present job is to handle our customer's accounts and cash flow of our company. During these years, I have come in touch with almost our every client and I have done multiple of site visits. After making good relations with them, I am feeling that I can handle marketing department very well as I have gained good customer trust and cummunications skills which can be helpful to lock new deals with our customers for a long run benefit.

Although, this is also true that I want to gain a new skill. But to do that, I do not want to change company as here work environment, management and salary requrements are quite suitable to me. So, I would appreciate if you will think about my request and give me a chance to prove my self in the another department of our company.

Thank your in advance for reading my request. I look forward for your positive responce.

Yours faithfully,

Harpreet kaur

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 7.0

The letter successfully addresses all three bullet points of the prompt. You clearly state your experience in the accounts department, explain the benefits of your transfer to marketing, and provide valid reasons for wanting to remain with the company. The tone is appropriate for a formal letter to a manager. To reach a higher band, ensure that your ideas are slightly more developed; for instance, you could provide a specific example of a successful interaction with a client to better illustrate your potential in the marketing department.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5

The letter is logically organized with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a closing. You use basic cohesive devices such as 'Particularly', 'Although', and 'So' to connect your ideas. However, some transitions feel a bit mechanical or slightly awkward, such as starting a sentence with 'Although, this is also true that...'. Improving the variety of your linking words and ensuring smoother transitions between sentences would help the flow of the letter feel more natural and professional.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'career development', 'customer trust', and 'long run benefit'. There are some minor errors in word choice and spelling, such as 'cummunications' (communication), 'requrements' (requirements), and 'responce' (response). Additionally, phrases like 'multiple of site visits' are slightly unnatural. Focusing on accurate spelling and more precise collocations will help you achieve a higher score in this criterion.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

You use a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, which is appropriate for this task. However, there are several grammatical errors, including 'I am feeling that I can handle marketing department' (missing 'the'), 'prove my self' (should be 'myself'), and 'Thank your in advance' (should be 'you'). While these errors do not impede communication, they occur frequently enough to impact the overall accuracy. Try to proofread your work to catch these small slips in articles, prepositions, and verb forms.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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