Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-08-19

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

 

You started in your present job two years ago. You now feel it is important for your career development to move to a different department in the same company.

Write a letter to your manager. In your letter

• say what you have learned in your present job
• suggest how the company would benefit from moving you to a different department
• explain why you do not wish to leave the company

You do NOT need to write any addresses.

Begin your letter as follows:

Dear ....................................,

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Dear Sir or Madam,

I am writing this letter regarding the switch my current position as a administrative clerk to Health and safety officer at Bonnechere Manor.

I have been working at Bonnechere Manor since 2024 January and I felt this is the perfect time to switch the field and purse the career which I have good knowledge and experience.

My current job is foundation of my career, I learned numerous career skills and experience including communication, time management and Teamwork. Similarly, I am understood how this organization function and its role in society.

I have a few years of experience as a Health and safety officer. I think I would be the perfect candidate for this role at our company because I have a certification as well as experience which completely match with this organization requirements.

I do not want to leave this organization because I already spend my 2 years and I deeply understand the organization structure and policies.

YOURS SINCERC

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The letter addresses all three bullet points required by the prompt: skills learned, benefits to the company, and reasons for staying. However, the development of these ideas is somewhat superficial. For instance, while you mention 'communication' and 'time management', you do not elaborate on how these specifically apply to your current role. The benefit to the company is stated as having a certification, but it lacks a persuasive argument regarding how your transition would specifically improve departmental efficiency. To reach a higher band, ensure that your ideas are fully extended with specific examples or logical explanations rather than just listing them.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The letter follows a logical structure, moving from the purpose of the letter to your background, the proposal, and your commitment to the company. Paragraphing is present, though the paragraphs are quite short and could be better connected. The use of cohesive devices is somewhat mechanical (e.g., 'Similarly', 'I think'). There is a lack of variety in transition words, and some sentences feel disjointed. Improving the flow between sentences by using a wider range of linking words would help create a more professional and cohesive tone suitable for a formal business letter.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task but lacks the precision and sophistication required for higher bands. There are some awkward collocations and word choices, such as 'switch the field' instead of 'change career paths' and 'purse the career' (likely a typo for 'pursue'). The phrase 'completely match with this organization requirements' is also slightly unnatural. While the meaning is clear, the range of vocabulary is limited to common, everyday terms. Incorporating more professional, industry-specific terminology would enhance the quality of your writing.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

There are several grammatical errors that occur throughout the text. Examples include 'the switch my current position as a administrative clerk' (missing prepositions and articles), 'I am understood how this organization function' (incorrect passive/active voice and subject-verb agreement), and 'I already spend my 2 years' (incorrect tense). While you attempt some complex structures, they are often marred by these errors. To improve, focus on basic subject-verb agreement, correct tense usage, and the proper use of articles (a/an/the). The majority of your sentences are simple, and the errors occasionally distract the reader.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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