Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-08-20

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

 

You started in your present job two years ago. You now feel it is important for your career development to move to a different department in the same company.

Write a letter to your manager. In your letter

• say what you have learned in your present job
• suggest how the company would benefit from moving you to a different department
• explain why you do not wish to leave the company

You do NOT need to write any addresses.

Begin your letter as follows:

Dear ....................................,

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Dear sir,

I hope you are doing well. I stared my career in sales department with this organization about two years ago, at that time I did not know anything about sales and customer service.

After I successfully passed 6 months within this company as a relationship manager, I learned how to talk with customers and how to deal with their problems.

Moreover, I think the time has come when I want to look myself as a area head of the sales department. I assure you that I and my team will work together and try to increase the overall sales of the company and also it is bigger opportunity to me to work on better sales ideas and schemes.

To add this, I do not want to resign from this organization because I feel like family in this company. My collogues always behave very gently to me and junior staff always give respect to me. So, because of that I do not wish to leave this company.

Yours faithfully,

Darshil

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The letter addresses all three bullet points required by the prompt. You clearly state what you learned in your current role, explain the benefits of your transfer, and express your commitment to the company. However, the development of these ideas is somewhat limited. For instance, the second bullet point regarding company benefits is a bit vague; you mention increasing sales but do not explain how your specific skills would translate to a new department. To reach a higher band, ensure that your arguments are more fully extended and supported with specific details or professional reasoning.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5

The letter is logically organized into clear paragraphs, each focusing on a specific requirement of the task. You use basic cohesive devices such as 'Moreover' and 'To add this' to transition between ideas. However, the flow is occasionally mechanical, and some transitions feel slightly abrupt. The use of referencing is generally clear, though the structure of the sentences within the paragraphs could be more varied to improve the overall progression of your argument. Overall, the message is easy to follow, but more sophisticated linking words would enhance the cohesion.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

Your vocabulary is adequate for the task, allowing you to communicate your intentions clearly. You use some relevant professional terms like 'relationship manager' and 'career development'. However, there are some inaccuracies in word choice and collocation, such as 'look myself as a area head' (should be 'see myself as an area head') and 'behave very gently' (which sounds unnatural in a professional context). To improve, focus on using more precise professional collocations and avoid repetitive phrasing. The range is sufficient for the task but lacks the flexibility required for higher bands.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

You demonstrate a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While the meaning is generally clear, there are several grammatical errors, such as 'I stared my career' (spelling error: 'started'), 'at that time I did not know' (comma splice), and 'it is bigger opportunity to me' (missing article: 'a bigger opportunity'). These errors occur frequently but do not impede communication. To achieve a higher score, you should aim for greater accuracy in your complex sentences and pay closer attention to subject-verb agreement and article usage. Proofreading for minor slips would significantly improve your score.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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