Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-08-21

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

 

You started in your present job two years ago. You now feel it is important for your career development to move to a different department in the same company.

Write a letter to your manager. In your letter

• say what you have learned in your present job
• suggest how the company would benefit from moving you to a different department
• explain why you do not wish to leave the company

You do NOT need to write any addresses.

Begin your letter as follows:

Dear ....................................,

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Dear Mr. John,

I hope you are doing well.I am writing to ask for your help on transferring my department in your company from sales to management class. I have been working in sales department in your office since two years and I have learned many skills like how to communicate with customers and other employees. We are working on international level which makes me to learn new languages like French, Chinese etc. I was under confident and a shy when I join the agency ,however now I am pretty confident enough to speak in front of thousands of people.

As I have seen the firm in its good and bad time it will helpful to have me in the management department. I have make good relations with our costumers that will help the company in the future for sure.In addition to this, all the management staff are known to me which make me easier to deal with them and vice versa.My knowledge on production,marketing and advertisement will definitely impact the business in a positive way.

Although, I got this opportunity in different agency but I want to stick here because of a helpful environment, health policies and behaviour of the staff.

I look forward to hearing from you soon. Thanking you.

Yours Sincerely,

Kruti Patel

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.5

You have addressed all three bullet points in the prompt: describing your current skills, explaining the benefits of your transfer, and stating your reasons for staying with the company. The tone is generally appropriate for a formal letter to a manager. However, some ideas could be more fully developed. For example, when mentioning your knowledge of production and marketing, you could provide a specific example of how this would specifically assist the management team. Overall, the purpose of the letter is clear, and the response effectively communicates your request while maintaining a professional and positive tone throughout the correspondence.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The letter is logically organized into clear paragraphs, each focusing on a specific requirement of the task. You use some cohesive devices such as 'In addition to this' and 'Although', which help the flow of ideas. However, the transition between sentences is sometimes a bit mechanical, and the use of referencing could be improved to make the text feel more natural. For instance, the link between your past experience and your future potential in the management department could be strengthened with more sophisticated linking words. Overall, the progression of ideas is clear and easy to follow.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for this task, such as 'career development', 'international level', and 'positive way'. There are some minor inaccuracies in word choice, such as 'management class' (which should likely be 'management department') and 'make good relations' (which should be 'build good relationships'). While you attempt to use some less common vocabulary, these occasional errors in collocation slightly limit the precision of your writing. To reach a higher band, focus on using more natural collocations and ensuring that your word choices are contextually accurate for a professional business environment.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

You use a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. There are several grammatical errors, such as 'since two years' (should be 'for two years'), 'makes me to learn' (should be 'enables me to learn'), and 'it will helpful' (should be 'it would be helpful'). Additionally, there are some issues with article usage and verb tense consistency. While these errors are noticeable, they do not generally impede the reader's understanding of your message. To improve, pay closer attention to subject-verb agreement and the correct use of infinitives after certain verbs.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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