Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-08-22

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

 

You started in your present job two years ago. You now feel it is important for your career development to move to a different department in the same company.

Write a letter to your manager. In your letter

• say what you have learned in your present job
• suggest how the company would benefit from moving you to a different department
• explain why you do not wish to leave the company

You do NOT need to write any addresses.

Begin your letter as follows:

Dear ....................................,

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Dear James,

I am writing this to request for department change from production to maintenance for career advancement.

As you know that, I have been working as a production supervisor at Seenergy Foods limited since 2024, I have learned management and material handling skills. Also, I got knowledge about team development and manpower allocation at my present position.

I would help to reduce downtime for breakdown. Also, I will help company by providing schedule preventative maintenance plan to achieve projected annual revenue with low maintenance budget. In addition, I will make sure to keep the production fulfillment.

I do not want to leave this organization because I have learned many managerial skills hear and I would like to help this industry to reach at top-notch revenue generation. Moreover, I have plenty of knowledge of this company and machines.

Thank you for your consideration. I look forward to your prompt response.

Kind Regards,

Roj

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

You have addressed all three bullet points in the prompt: describing your current learning, explaining the benefits of your transfer, and stating why you wish to remain at the company. The tone is appropriate for a formal letter to a manager. However, the development of ideas is somewhat limited. For example, while you mention 'management and material handling skills,' these could be expanded with a specific example of a project or achievement. Similarly, the benefits to the company are stated in a list-like fashion rather than being fully integrated into a persuasive argument. To reach a higher band, ensure your ideas are more thoroughly elaborated.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The letter follows a logical structure with clear paragraphing. You use basic cohesive devices such as 'Also,' 'In addition,' and 'Moreover' to connect your ideas. However, the use of these connectors is somewhat repetitive and mechanical, which limits the flow of the text. The transition between the introduction and the body paragraphs is clear, but the internal cohesion within the paragraphs could be improved by using a wider variety of linking words and better referencing to avoid simple sentence structures. Overall, the message is easy to follow, but the progression of ideas lacks sophistication.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

Your vocabulary is adequate for the task, allowing you to communicate your intentions clearly. You use some industry-specific terms like 'manpower allocation,' 'preventative maintenance,' and 'downtime,' which is positive. However, there are some word choice errors, such as 'request for department change' (should be 'request a change of department') and 'hear' (should be 'here'). The range of vocabulary is somewhat limited and relies on fairly common expressions. To improve, try to incorporate more precise collocations and avoid repetitive phrasing when describing your professional skills and contributions.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

You demonstrate a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While the meaning is generally clear, there are several grammatical errors that occur throughout the text. For instance, 'As you know that, I have been working' is grammatically incorrect; it should be 'As you know, I have been working.' There are also issues with articles and prepositions, such as 'help company' (should be 'help the company') and 'reach at top-notch' (should be 'reach top-notch'). These errors do not impede communication, but they are frequent enough to prevent a higher score. Focus on subject-verb agreement and article usage.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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