Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-08-22

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

 

You started in your present job two years ago. You now feel it is important for your career development to move to a different department in the same company.

Write a letter to your manager. In your letter

• say what you have learned in your present job
• suggest how the company would benefit from moving you to a different department
• explain why you do not wish to leave the company

You do NOT need to write any addresses.

Begin your letter as follows:

Dear ....................................,

Student answer (Band 6.5)

Dear Manager,

I hope this letter finds you well. I am writing to express my interest in the marketing department in our office.

Although I have been working in the logistics department for the last five years; and I have learned various skills, including communication, analytical, and teamwork, I want to transfer to the marketing sector. Moreover, leadership skills have also improved by me while working on different projects and presentations collaboratively.

Furthermore, I have also enrolled in the Business and Project management course in which I will come across several group activities to boost my confidence and develop management skills. Therefore, implementing those skills into our marketing strategies would contribute to improve the company's overall revenue.

Considering the values and opportunities company provided me, I do not wish to leave this company. Apart from it, working online while attending online classes will be beneficial for me to save money and travel time. I hope you would better understand and appreciate my decision.

Thank you for your support and cooperation.

Yours faithfully,

Tom

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.5

You have addressed all three bullet points required by the prompt. You clearly stated what you learned in your current role, explained the benefits of your transfer to the marketing department, and expressed your commitment to the company. The ideas are relevant and the tone is appropriate for a formal letter. However, the development of the ideas is somewhat brief. For instance, explaining how your specific skills would benefit the marketing department could be more detailed to fully satisfy the 'well-developed' requirement of higher bands. Overall, the response is clear and fulfills the task requirements effectively.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5

The letter follows a logical structure with clear paragraphing. You use cohesive devices such as 'Moreover', 'Furthermore', and 'Therefore' to link your ideas. While these are generally used correctly, the flow between sentences is occasionally slightly mechanical. The progression of ideas is easy to follow, and the purpose of each paragraph is distinct. To improve, ensure that the transition between your current role and the proposed benefits of the transfer is more seamless, as the current shift feels a bit abrupt. Overall, the organization is clear and serves the purpose of the letter well.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'analytical', 'collaboratively', and 'strategies'. There are some minor inaccuracies in word choice, such as 'contribute to improve' (should be 'contribute to improving') and 'marketing sector' (which sounds slightly unnatural; 'marketing department' is preferred). You also use some repetitive phrasing, such as 'online' twice in the same sentence. To reach a higher band, try to incorporate more precise collocations and avoid repeating words in close proximity. The vocabulary used is sufficient to convey your meaning clearly without any impediment to the reader.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

You use a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. There are some grammatical errors, such as the punctuation error in the second paragraph ('five years; and I have'), and the awkward passive construction 'leadership skills have also improved by me'. Additionally, 'contribute to improve' is a common error; it should be followed by the gerund form. While these errors are noticeable, they do not impede communication. To improve, focus on subject-verb agreement and the correct use of gerunds after specific verbs. Increasing your control over complex sentence structures will help you achieve a higher score.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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