Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-08-25

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

 

You started in your present job two years ago. You now feel it is important for your career development to move to a different department in the same company.

Write a letter to your manager. In your letter

• say what you have learned in your present job
• suggest how the company would benefit from moving you to a different department
• explain why you do not wish to leave the company

You do NOT need to write any addresses.

Begin your letter as follows:

Dear ....................................,

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Dear Mr. Jones,

My name is Shubham Savaliya. I have been working for two years at Meril Life Sciences Pvt. Ltd. I am writing this letter to request a department change in the same company to you.

Honestly, I have learned too many things in my present job. I learned how to tackle the situation in a tough condition. I also developed the critical thinking ability, enhanced my decision-making ability, and gained some discipline throughout the career.

There are various benefits that the company would get if they moved me to a different department. I also learned different department perspectives, and I ensure that I will definitely grow the company through gaining such types of different experiences.

Additionally, I do not want to leave the company, because this company has provided me a lot of things. They gave me better health insurance when I was sick and admitted to the hospital. Moreover, my team leader has taught me very insightful skills that would be beneficial to grow my future career. So, due to all these positive things, I do not even think about leaving my present company.

Thank you for your continuous support. I am looking for your response.

Kind regards,

Shubham Savaliya

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

You have addressed all three bullet points of the prompt. You clearly outlined your learning experiences, suggested benefits for the company, and provided a personal reason for wanting to stay. However, the development of these ideas is somewhat superficial. For example, when discussing how the company would benefit from your move, you mention 'gaining such types of different experiences' but do not specify how your current skills would translate into value for a new department. To achieve a higher band, ensure your arguments are more specific and fully extended rather than relying on general statements.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5

The letter is logically organized with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a closing. You use basic cohesive devices such as 'Additionally', 'Moreover', and 'So' to connect your ideas. While the progression is clear, the use of cohesive devices is sometimes a bit mechanical or repetitive. The paragraphing is appropriate for a formal letter, and the overall structure is easy to follow. To improve, try to vary your linking words and ensure that the transition between your personal gratitude and your professional request is smoother.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'critical thinking', 'insightful skills', and 'department perspectives'. However, there are some instances of slightly unnatural phrasing, such as 'tackle the situation in a tough condition' and 'grow the company through gaining such types of different experiences'. These choices are understandable but lack the precision and natural collocation expected at higher bands. Expanding your vocabulary to include more professional collocations would enhance the formal tone of your writing.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

You use a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While your meaning is always clear, there are several grammatical inaccuracies, such as 'I am writing this letter to request a department change in the same company to you' (word order) and 'admitted to the hospital' (article usage). Additionally, 'I am looking for your response' is slightly unnatural; 'I look forward to hearing from you' is the standard professional convention. Despite these errors, they do not impede communication, and your control of basic grammar is generally sound.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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