Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-08-25

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

 

You started in your present job two years ago. You now feel it is important for your career development to move to a different department in the same company.

Write a letter to your manager. In your letter

  • say what you have learned in your present job
  • suggest how the company would benefit from moving you to a different department
  • explain why you do not wish to leave the company

You do NOT need to write any addresses.

Begin your letter as follows:

Dear ....................................,

Student answer (Band 5.0)

DEAR SIR ,

I AM MANJIT KAUR I STARTED IN YOUR NURSING COMPANY AS A PERSONAL TRAINER WORKER IN THE LAST TWO YEARS AGO UTNIL THE NOW. I LEARNED A LOT FROM MY THIS JOB SUCH AS HOW TO DO THE PERNINAL CARE, HOW TO GIVE THE GOOD CARE TO THE OLD PEOPLE WHICH MEANT A LOT TO ME TO LEARN.

MOREOVER, I WOULD LIKE TO MOVE IN A DIFFERNT BUT WITH THE SAME COMANY FOR MY FUTURE CARRER DEVELOPMENT. IN THIS MOVING PROCESS THE COMPANY WILL GET A GOOD RANGE OF BENFITS FROM ME TO MOVE TO ANOTHER DEPARMENT. I CAN SUGGEST TO MY FRIENDS TO MOVE IN THIS COMANY FOR THE BETTER CARRER WITH LOT OF NEW OPPERTUNTIES THIS WAY MANY PEOPLE WILL BE APPLY IN THIS COMANY.

I DO NOT WANT TO LEAVE THIS COMPANY BEACAUSE IN THIS I MADE LOT OF FRIEND WHO HELP TO ME LOT IN MY WORK ASSIGMENTS.

YOURS FAITHFULLY

MANJIT KAUR

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response5.0
Coherence and Cohesion5.0
Lexical Resource5.0
Grammatical Range and Accuracy4.5
Overall5.0

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0

The letter addresses all three bullet points of the prompt, but the development of ideas is quite limited. While you mention what you learned, the explanation of how the company would benefit from your move is vague and lacks professional focus; suggesting that you will tell friends to apply is not a strong business argument for an internal transfer. The tone is generally appropriate for a formal letter, but the content needs more depth and professional justification to fully satisfy the requirements of the task.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0

The letter is organised into paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the structure. However, the use of cohesive devices is very limited and sometimes mechanical. There is a lack of logical flow between sentences, and the transition between the points is abrupt. The use of referencing is occasionally unclear, such as in the final paragraph where the reference to 'in this' is grammatically incomplete and confusing. More variety in linking words would improve the overall progression of ideas.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.0

The vocabulary is quite basic and repetitive, with several spelling errors such as 'carrer', 'oppertunties', 'beacause', and 'differnt'. The range of vocabulary is limited, relying on simple phrases to convey meaning. While the message is understandable, the lack of precision and the frequent spelling mistakes hinder the professional tone required for a formal letter to a manager. To improve, you should focus on learning topic-specific vocabulary related to professional development and workplace environments.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 4.5

There are frequent grammatical errors throughout the text, including issues with verb tenses ('I started... in the last two years ago'), word order, and sentence structure. Many sentences are simple, and attempts at more complex structures often result in errors that can cause difficulty for the reader. Punctuation is also inconsistent, particularly with the use of capital letters and spacing. Significant improvement in basic sentence construction and proofreading for grammatical accuracy is required.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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