Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-08-28

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

 

You started in your present job two years ago. You now feel it is important for your career development to move to a different department in the same company.

Write a letter to your manager. In your letter

• say what you have learned in your present job
• suggest how the company would benefit from moving you to a different department
• explain why you do not wish to leave the company

You do NOT need to write any addresses.

Begin your letter as follows:

Dear ....................................,

Student answer (Band 6.5)

Dear Manager,

I am writing this letter to share some of the skills and life lessons that I have learned as a behavior support worker in Beleva. I learned, how to handle aggressive clients or clients with physical disabilities with coping strategies. This work field enhance my tolerance power and punctuality as I become more attentive about my daily schedules.

I saw new job posting for the supervisor department on the office board. I think, I am a perfect match for this department as I had 2 years of work experience and also I think I am a good listener with leadership quality as well. I also believe that I can solve problems quickly and make vise decisions.

I want to take a new step towards my career without leaving this company because this organization gave me a path to fulfill my dreams. This is not just a company for me, this is a second home to me and I love this Beleva family because, It taught me the true meaning of kindness and humble. I love staff spirit while working with different personalities and always trying their best to serve them.

I am looking forward to see your kind consideration on this request.

Yours sincerely,

Harmanpreet kaur

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 7.0

You have addressed all three bullet points of the prompt effectively. You clearly outlined your learning experiences, explained the benefits of your transfer to the supervisor department, and expressed your loyalty to the company. The tone is appropriate for a formal letter to a manager. To reach a higher band, ensure that your explanation of how the company would benefit is more specific; for example, you could elaborate on how your existing knowledge of client needs would improve supervisory oversight. Overall, the ideas are relevant and well-developed, meeting the requirements of the task.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5

The letter is logically organized into clear paragraphs, each focusing on a specific aspect of the prompt. You use some cohesive devices, such as 'I also believe' and 'because', to link your ideas. However, the flow between sentences could be improved by using a wider variety of linking words and transition phrases. Some transitions feel slightly mechanical or repetitive. Improving the use of referencing and substitution would help the text flow more naturally. Despite these minor issues, the progression of ideas is clear and easy to follow throughout the letter.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'coping strategies', 'leadership quality', and 'career development'. However, there are some inaccuracies in word choice and form, such as 'tolerance power' (instead of 'patience' or 'resilience'), 'vise decisions' (spelling error for 'wise'), and 'humble' (used as a noun instead of 'humility'). While these errors do not impede communication, they indicate a need for more precise control over word forms and collocations to reach a higher band. Expanding your range of topic-specific vocabulary would also be beneficial.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

You use a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. There are several grammatical errors, such as 'I learned, how to' (incorrect comma usage), 'This work field enhance' (subject-verb agreement error), and 'I am looking forward to see' (should be 'to seeing'). Punctuation is also inconsistent, particularly with comma placement. While these errors are noticeable, they do not prevent the reader from understanding your message. To improve, focus on subject-verb agreement, correct verb patterns after prepositions, and refining your use of complex sentence structures to ensure they are error-free.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.