Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-08-29

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

 

You started in your present job two years ago. You now feel it is important for your career development to move to a different department in the same company.

Write a letter to your manager. In your letter

• say what you have learned in your present job
• suggest how the company would benefit from moving you to a different department
• explain why you do not wish to leave the company

You do NOT need to write any addresses.

Begin your letter as follows:

Dear ....................................,

Student answer (Band 6.5)

Dear Sir,

I hope you are doing well. I am writing this letter to request for my transfer to a different department within the company.

I started with your organization two years ago, and I am working in the early years. Last week, I noticed a new opening for a team leader in kids' club, which is for before- and after-school care.

Moving forward, in my last two years, I have gained valuable experience to work with young children, and now I want to enhance my knowledge by working with little older children. Also, now I am familiar with all the policies and procedures of the institution.

As our company needs a confident and passonate employer for this role. I consider myself best fit for this role. In addition, I am good with computer work and this job needs a person good with technological skill because of the admin work.

Moreover, I built good connections with all of the team members. I really like the working environment of the company as well. That is why I want to stay within the company for a longer period of time.

Thank you for your time and consideration. I look forward to hearing from you soon.

Yours Faithfully

David

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 7.0

You have addressed all three bullet points in the prompt. You clearly stated your experience in the current role, explained the benefits of your transfer to the company, and expressed your commitment to the organization. The tone is appropriate for a formal letter to a manager. To improve, ensure your ideas are more fully developed; for instance, when mentioning the benefits to the company, you could provide more specific examples of how your computer skills would directly improve the efficiency of the new department. Overall, the purpose of the letter is clear and the response is well-structured for a General Training Task 1.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 7.0

The letter follows a logical progression, moving from the request to your experience, the benefits of the move, and finally your reasons for staying. Paragraphing is used effectively to separate these ideas. You use some cohesive devices such as 'In addition', 'Moreover', and 'That is why' to link your sentences. However, some transitions feel slightly mechanical. To reach a higher band, try to vary your linking phrases and ensure that the flow between sentences is more natural, rather than relying on standard list-like connectors.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'valuable experience', 'policies and procedures', and 'consideration'. There are some minor errors in word choice, such as 'passonate employer' (should be 'passionate employee') and 'little older children' (should be 'slightly older children'). While the vocabulary is sufficient to convey your meaning clearly, it lacks the precision and flexibility required for higher bands. Focusing on more sophisticated collocations and ensuring accurate word forms will help improve your score in this area.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

You use a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. There are several grammatical errors, such as 'I am working in the early years' (should be 'I have been working in the early years department') and 'I consider myself best fit' (should be 'I consider myself the best fit'). Additionally, there are some punctuation issues, such as the sentence fragment 'As our company needs a confident and passonate employer for this role.' Despite these errors, the meaning remains clear throughout the letter, and the mistakes do not significantly impede communication.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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