Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-08-31

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

 

You started in your present job two years ago. You now feel it is important for your career development to move to a different department in the same company.

Write a letter to your manager. In your letter

• say what you have learned in your present job
• suggest how the company would benefit from moving you to a different department
• explain why you do not wish to leave the company

You do NOT need to write any addresses.

Begin your letter as follows:

Dear ....................................,

Student answer (Band 5.0)

Sir,

Well, I am writing a letter to you because of that. I found another job. Right now, I am working at a job; it's a good company. There are many benefits to this, let's say medical for my kids and my wife. Pick and drop

Also, yearly holidays. I joined three years ago

Currently. I can change jobs for this; I have no more memory to control our expenses. Right now, the situation is out of control; my kids are young boys; they are going to universities, you know very well, so many fees I cannot afford, and one more thing, my house is on rent, bills, etc

I hope that you will understand my feelings and my problem. I have spent many years with your company. I wish you were not angry with me and my decision, so

I am grateful to you and your company; I spent a lot of time

your sincerely,

Arqam

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 4.0

The response fails to address the core requirements of the prompt. The instructions specifically ask you to write to your manager requesting a transfer to a different department within the same company for career development. Instead, your letter discusses leaving the company entirely due to financial difficulties. Because you have misunderstood the fundamental purpose of the task, you have not addressed the bullet points regarding what you have learned in your current role or how the company would benefit from your transfer. The content is off-topic, which significantly impacts the score.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0

The letter lacks a logical structure. The paragraphs are disjointed, and there is no clear progression of ideas. The use of cohesive devices is very limited and often inappropriate, such as the abrupt transition 'Well, I am writing a letter to you because of that.' The lack of a formal structure for a business letter makes it difficult for the reader to follow your intent. To improve, you should use clear topic sentences for each paragraph and linking words like 'furthermore,' 'consequently,' or 'in addition' to connect your thoughts logically.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.0

The vocabulary is basic and repetitive, often relying on informal or conversational language that is unsuitable for a professional letter to a manager. Phrases like 'pick and drop' and 'no more memory to control our expenses' are unnatural and imprecise. There is a lack of professional terminology related to career development or corporate environments. To reach a higher band, you need to expand your range of vocabulary to include more formal, precise expressions that are appropriate for a workplace context.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0

The grammatical range is limited, consisting mostly of simple sentences. There are frequent errors in sentence structure, punctuation, and tense usage, such as 'I am writing a letter to you because of that' and 'I wish you were not angry with me and my decision, so'. These errors, combined with fragmented sentence construction, occasionally impede the clarity of your message. You should focus on mastering basic sentence structures and ensuring subject-verb agreement before attempting more complex grammatical forms.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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