Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-09-01

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

 

You started in your present job two years ago. You now feel it is important for your career development to move to a different department in the same company.

Write a letter to your manager. In your letter

• say what you have learned in your present job
• suggest how the company would benefit from moving you to a different department
• explain why you do not wish to leave the company

You do NOT need to write any addresses.

Begin your letter as follows:

Dear ....................................,

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Dear Mr Raj,

I am writing a letter to request regarding my career development. I started my present job in this company two years ago. Now, I would like to move to a different department in the same company because I have completed my two years work in this HR role; moreover, I learned a lot about this field.

Acutually, I wish to explore inovative skills as a team leader of the Manger. If I move to this department, I will ensure my dedication and passion about my work towards this company. This changes not only benefit to me, but also company economic profits will raise. As my clients and kins are intersting to invest money in our company for stock exchanges. That would be really grateful to our company.

I am delighted to work this organization since it helps me in all my learning phases, which is why I will not leave this company.

Thank you. I would really appreciate to you, If you could agree my request.

I am waiting for your postive response.

Yours sincerely,

Chindam Manasa

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

You have addressed all three bullet points required by the prompt. You mentioned your learning in the HR role, suggested benefits to the company, and explained your loyalty. However, the development of these ideas is somewhat limited. For instance, the explanation regarding how the company would benefit from your move is slightly unclear and lacks professional detail, particularly the mention of 'kins' and 'stock exchanges,' which feels somewhat disconnected from a standard internal transfer request. To improve, ensure your arguments are more focused on professional contributions and business logic.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The letter follows a logical structure with a clear opening and closing. You have used some cohesive devices, such as 'moreover' and 'not only... but also,' to link ideas. However, the paragraphing is inconsistent, and some transitions feel mechanical or abrupt. The flow between the second and third paragraphs could be smoother. Additionally, the referencing is occasionally unclear, such as in the sentence 'This changes not only benefit to me,' where the pronoun reference is slightly awkward. Improving the use of linking phrases will help the ideas progress more naturally.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

You have an adequate range of vocabulary to complete the task, but there are several instances of word-choice errors and spelling mistakes that detract from the professional tone. Examples include 'Acutually' (Actually), 'inovative' (innovative), and 'Manger' (Manager). Furthermore, the phrase 'kins are intersting to invest' is not appropriate for a formal business letter. To reach a higher band, focus on using more precise professional terminology and ensure you proofread for spelling accuracy, as these errors occasionally hinder the clarity of your message.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

You demonstrate a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors throughout the text. Issues include subject-verb agreement ('company economic profits will raise' should be 'rise'), preposition errors ('appreciate to you' should be 'appreciate it if you'), and awkward phrasing ('I am writing a letter to request regarding'). While these errors do not completely prevent the reader from understanding your intent, they are frequent enough to impact the overall fluency of the letter. Focus on mastering basic sentence construction and verb patterns to improve your accuracy.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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