Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-09-07

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

 

You started in your present job two years ago. You now feel it is important for your career development to move to a different department in the same company.

Write a letter to your manager. In your letter

  • say what you have learned in your present job
  • suggest how the company would benefit from moving you to a different department
  • explain why you do not wish to leave the company

You do NOT need to write any addresses.

Begin your letter as follows:

Dear ....................................,

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Dear Billy

Hope you are doing well. I'm excited and glad to inform you that It's been 2 years since I started my job in our company.

In this 2 years I have learned all areas in supporting the patient services. Because of our team help and encouragement from the management, I had learned multiple Pharmacy hub, prior authorisation of medications and customer support. I'm glad to get the help from all our team. Now I have decided to advance my career in Pharmacy benefits department where my previous knowledge would help me to advance my career path in this new department . I felt this is the important decision in my life to improve my knowledge and potential towards the patient services.

I hope this decision would helps to improve the company for taking care of upcoming projects, As we all know, our new projects would working together with both Pharmacy benefit and Prior Authorisation departments, my knowledge and experience would benefit the company If could get the chance to move further in my career. I never get a thought to leave the company because of the positive culture, work life balance and management support and I would like to continue with the company.

Thank you

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response6.5
Coherence and Cohesion6.0
Lexical Resource6.0
Grammatical Range and Accuracy5.5
Overall6.0

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.5

The letter addresses all three bullet points required by the prompt. You clearly state what you have learned, explain the benefits to the company of your move, and express your commitment to staying with the organization. The tone is appropriate for a professional letter to a manager. However, the development of ideas is somewhat repetitive; for instance, the explanation of how your skills would benefit the company could be more specific regarding the 'upcoming projects' you mentioned. To reach a higher band, ensure that each point is fully extended with concrete examples rather than general statements about your enthusiasm.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The letter is organized into logical paragraphs, which helps the reader follow your progression. You use some cohesive devices, such as 'Because of' and 'As we all know', to link ideas. However, the flow between sentences is occasionally mechanical, and some transitions feel slightly abrupt. For example, the jump from discussing your past learning to your future career path could be smoother. Additionally, the use of referencing is sometimes unclear, such as in the sentence 'I hope this decision would helps to improve the company', where the link between your move and the company's improvement is not explicitly connected.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'career development', 'prior authorisation', and 'work-life balance'. However, there are some inaccuracies in word choice and collocation, such as 'learned all areas in supporting' (should be 'learned about all areas of') and 'I never get a thought to leave' (should be 'I have never considered leaving'). While these errors do not impede communication, they limit the precision of your writing. To improve, focus on using more natural collocations and avoiding repetitive phrasing when describing your professional experience.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

You use a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors throughout the text. Examples include subject-verb agreement issues like 'this decision would helps' and 'our new projects would working', as well as tense inconsistencies such as 'I had learned' instead of 'I have learned'. While these errors are noticeable, they do not prevent the reader from understanding your message. To achieve a higher score, you should proofread carefully to ensure consistent verb tenses and correct subject-verb agreement, and try to incorporate a wider variety of complex sentence structures with greater accuracy.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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