Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-09-16

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

 

You started in your present job two years ago. You now feel it is important for your career development to move to a different department in the same company.

Write a letter to your manager. In your letter

• say what you have learned in your present job
• suggest how the company would benefit from moving you to a different department
• explain why you do not wish to leave the company

You do NOT need to write any addresses.

Begin your letter as follows:

Dear ....................................,

Student answer (Band 6.5)

Dear Manager,

I am writing to request a transfer to a different deapartment within the company, as I believe this would be beneficial for my career development.

During the past two years in my current position, I have gained valuable experience in dealing with customers, working as part of a team and managing my workload effectively. I have also developed strong communication and problem-solving skills.

I believe that moving to the Marketing Department would benefit the company because I could use my existing knowledge and experience while developing new skills. My understanding of customers and the company's products could help me contributes effectively to marketing activities.

i would like to emphasise that I do not wish to leave the comapny. I have enjoyed working here and greatly appreciate the supportive enviornment and opporunities I have received. Therefore, I would prefer to continue developing my career withing the organisation.

I would be grateful if you could consider my request.

Yours sincerely,

raja

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.5

The response successfully covers all bullet points outlined in the task instructions. You clearly state what you have learned during your past two years in your current role, such as dealing with customers and managing your workload. You also suggest how the company would benefit from a department move by mentioning your existing knowledge and ability to contribute effectively to marketing activities. Furthermore, you explain your reasons for wanting to stay within the organisation, expressing your appreciation for the supportive environment. All requirements of the prompt are addressed in a relevant and appropriate manner, demonstrating a clear and purposeful tone throughout.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 7.0

The letter is logically organised with a clear beginning, middle, and end. Each paragraph focuses on a specific aspect of the prompt, such as past learning, company benefits, and reasons for staying. Cohesive devices are used effectively to connect ideas, as seen in phrases like 'During the past two years' and 'Therefore, I would prefer'. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate different points, ensuring the reader can follow the letter without difficulty.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

You demonstrate a sufficient range of vocabulary for the task, using appropriate professional terms such as 'career development', 'transfer', 'workload effectively', and 'marketing activities'. There are a few minor spelling errors, such as 'deapartment' and 'enviornment', alongside 'comapny' and 'withing', but these do not impede communication. With more careful proofreading to eliminate minor slip-ups, a higher lexical score could be achieved.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.5

The letter displays a good mix of simple and complex sentence structures, such as 'I am writing to request a transfer...' and 'I believe that moving to the Marketing Department would benefit the company because I could use my existing knowledge...'. There is generally good control over grammar and punctuation, though there is a minor grammatical slip with 'helps me contributes effectively' instead of 'contribute'. The majority of sentences are accurate and communication is very clear.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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