Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-09-17

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

 

You started in your present job two years ago. You now feel it is important for your career development to move to a different department in the same company.

Write a letter to your manager. In your letter

• say what you have learned in your present job
• suggest how the company would benefit from moving you to a different department
• explain why you do not wish to leave the company

You do NOT need to write any addresses.

Begin your letter as follows:

Dear ....................................,

Student answer (Band 6.5)

Dear Sir/Madam,

I am writing to express my gratitude for giving me an excellent opportunity to work in your company. So far, it's been two years I am employed in marketing department as a head. Further, I genuinely want to expand my growth by working in accounting department.

In advertising, I am acquainted with all the techniques to aware the public about product in influential manner such as running advertisements in television, digital promotion of products through website and company's social networking sites, graphic designing of labels. Over and above, as a head keeping an eye on competitor's strategies as well.

I expect you could remember my first time interview in your company was actually to work as an accounting manager. However, during that time similar post was not vacant and because I was also having an experience in marketing field, you offered me a job in this field. From my qualification, it is clearly stated that I am certified chartered accountant. I request you to consider my transfer urge from marketing to accounting department.

As I am employed in your company from two years, I am impressed with the work environment as well as perks, salaries, bonuses, promotions being offered here. That's why, I want to remain a part of your organisation.

Thank you for your time and considerarion. I am looking forward to hear from you soon.

Yours sincerely,

Jasleen Kaur

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 7.0

The candidate has successfully addressed all three bullet points required in the task prompt. In the first paragraph, she mentions what she has learned in her present job as head of the marketing department. In the second and third paragraphs, she suggests how the company would benefit from her transfer, highlighting her background as a certified chartered accountant and her previous interviewing history. Finally, in the fourth paragraph, she clearly explains why she does not wish to leave the company, expressing satisfaction with the work environment and perks. The tone is appropriate for a formal letter to a manager. Although there are some minor awkward phrases, the overall response covers all parts of the task well with relevant and developed ideas. This performance aligns comfortably with the descriptors for Band 7.0.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5

The letter exhibits a clear logical organisation and progression throughout. The paragraphs are structured reasonably well, moving purposefully from the opening statement of intent to specific details about her skills, the reasons for requesting a transfer, and finally her appreciation for the company. Cohesive devices are used, such as 'Further', 'Over and above', and 'That's why', though some transitions feel slightly mechanical or are used with awkward phrasing (e.g., 'From my qualification, it is clearly stated that'). Paragraphing is sufficient, separating distinct points of the letter into readable blocks. While referencing is generally clear, occasional cohesive choices feel a bit unnatural, which prevents the response from reaching higher bands. Overall, the structural flow is sound and supports clear communication, earning a solid Band 6.5.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

The candidate demonstrates an adequate range of vocabulary suitable for a general workplace context. She attempts some less common vocabulary items such as 'gratitude', 'acquainted', 'strategies', and 'organisation'. However, there are noticeable lexical and collocational inaccuracies throughout the text, such as 'transfer urge' instead of 'transfer request', 'aware the public' instead of 'make the public aware', and 'considerarion' (spelling slip). Phrases like 'So far, it's been two years I am employed' also show awkward word choice and collocation. While these errors do not impede overall communication, they demonstrate a limited precision that caps the score. The vocabulary used is sufficient for the task, but lacks the flexibility and natural control required for higher bands, fitting well within the Band 6.0 descriptors.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

The student uses a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, demonstrating some variety in structure. For instance, she employs subordinate clauses such as 'when I expect you could remember my first time interview' and 'because I was also having an experience in marketing field'. However, there are frequent grammatical errors in tense usage, prepositions, and article placement. Examples include 'So far, it's been two years I am employed' (tense/structure error), 'in marketing department' (missing article), 'to aware the public about product' (word form/article error), and 'I am looking forward to hear' (gerund error). Punctuation is generally acceptable, and while these errors persist throughout the text, they rarely impede communication, allowing the reader to follow the intended meaning. This combination of structural variety and frequent local errors corresponds to a Band 6.0 score.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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