Band 7.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 7.5 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-09-18

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

 

You started in your present job two years ago. You now feel it is important for your career development to move to a different department in the same company.

Write a letter to your manager. In your letter

• say what you have learned in your present job
• suggest how the company would benefit from moving you to a different department
• explain why you do not wish to leave the company

You do NOT need to write any addresses.

Begin your letter as follows:

Dear ....................................,

Student answer (Band 7.5)

Dear Mr. James,

I am writing to request an internal department transfer to the investment division. I joined the organization two years ago as a management trainee and was promoted to finance manager last year. However, I believe I am more interested in fund management than accounting.

While I was working as the management trainee, I learned team management, work prioritization, and coordination with suppliers. After the promotion, I was more involved with report preparation on strict deadlines, and presentations to board members, which enhanced my presentation skills, and efficiency.

As I completed my master's program specializing in fund management, I realised that I am more competent in this subject area. Therefore, I am confident that I can make investment decisions and manage the company portfolio well. Since the company is looking to increase revenue through the investment income, I am willing to help the company, and team with my knowledge.

Although there are plenty of opportunities in the market, I would like to stay in the company because the firm helped me with flexible time schedules while I was pursuing my master's program. Additionally, I believe the company has a great future for me.

I hope you will consider my request, and I hope to hear from you soon.

Yours sincerely,

Yumi G.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 8.0

Yumi effectively covers all parts of the prompt in a well-structured letter. She clearly states what she learned in her present job, citing specific skills such as 'work prioritization' and 'report preparation'. She outlines how the company would benefit from her transfer by stating that she can 'make investment decisions and manage the company portfolio well' to help 'increase revenue through the investment income.' Furthermore, she clearly explains why she does not wish to leave the company, mentioning loyalty due to flexible time schedules granted during her master's program. The purpose of the letter is clear throughout and all bullet points are fully addressed, warranting a strong score in this category.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 8.0

The letter demonstrates a clear and logical progression of ideas from the initial request to the supporting details and final conclusion. Paragraphing is used very effectively to separate distinct topics, such as past learning, future contributions, and reasons for staying. Cohesive devices are used naturally throughout the text, as seen in transitions like 'While I was working', 'After the promotion', and 'Although there are plenty of opportunities'. Paragraphs are well-linked, and referencing is handled accurately, ensuring the reader easily follows the letter's purpose without confusion.

Lexical Resource — Band 7.0

Yumi displays a sufficient and flexible range of vocabulary suited to a professional correspondence task. She utilizes appropriate business and academic terminology, including phrases like 'internal department transfer', 'management trainee', 'competent in this subject area', and 'increase revenue'. While there are a few minor lexical choices that could be more polished—such as 'increase revenue through the investment income' where 'the' is unnecessary—the overall lexical control is strong. She successfully attempts less common vocabulary with an appropriate professional tone, showing good awareness of style and collocation.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 7.5

The response features a good mix of simple and complex sentence structures, demonstrating control over grammatical forms. Complex sentences involving subordinate clauses are used accurately, such as 'While I was working as the management trainee, I learned team management...' and 'Since the company is looking to increase revenue through the investment income, I am willing to help...'. Punctuation is generally accurate, though there are a few minor mechanical slips, such as unnecessary commas in sentences like 'I hope you will consider my request, and I hope to hear from you soon.' The majority of sentences are error-free, and grammar never impedes communication.

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