Band 8.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 8.0 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-09-18

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

 

You started in your present job two years ago. You now feel it is important for your career development to move to a different department in the same company.

Write a letter to your manager. In your letter

• say what you have learned in your present job
• suggest how the company would benefit from moving you to a different department
• explain why you do not wish to leave the company

You do NOT need to write any addresses.

Begin your letter as follows:

Dear ....................................,

Student answer (Band 8.0)

Dear Mr. James,

I am writing to request an internal department transfer to the investment division. I joined the organization two years ago as a management trainee and was promoted to finance manager last year. However, I believe I am more interested in fund management than accounting.

While I was working as a management trainee, I learned team management, work prioritization, and coordination with suppliers. After the promotion, I was more involved with report preparation on strict deadlines, and presentations to board members, which enhanced my presentation skills and efficiency.

As I completed my master's program specializing in fund management, I realised that I am more competent in this subject area. Therefore, I am confident that I can make investment decisions and manage the company portfolio well. Since the company is looking to increase revenue through investment income, I am willing to help the company and team with my knowledge.

Although there are plenty of opportunities in the market, I would like to stay in the company because the firm helped me with flexible time schedules while I was pursuing my master's program. Additionally, I believe the company has a great future for me.

I hope you will consider my request and I hope to hear from you soon.

Yours sincerely,

Yumi G.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 8.0

The candidate has successfully addressed all three bullet points of the task prompt. First, she clearly outlines what she has learned in her present job, citing specific skills such as 'team management' and 'report preparation on strict deadlines'. Second, she suggests how the company would benefit from her transfer, explaining that her master's degree in fund management enables her to 'make investment decisions and manage the company portfolio well' to increase revenue. Third, she explains why she wishes to stay in the company, highlighting the firm's support for her flexible schedule during her studies. The tone is appropriate for a formal letter to a manager, and the position and ideas are fully developed. This meets the criteria for a high band score.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 8.0

The letter is logically organized and easy to follow. Information and ideas are structured with a clear progression: the opening states the purpose of the letter, followed by paragraphs covering her past experience, her reasons for the transfer, and finally her reasons for staying at the company. Paragraphing is used appropriately, with distinct paragraphs handling distinct sub-topics. Cohesive devices such as 'While I was working', 'After the promotion', 'Therefore', and 'Although' are used naturally and effectively to guide the reader through the letter without being intrusive or mechanical.

Lexical Resource — Band 7.5

The candidate demonstrates a wide and flexible vocabulary range suited to a professional business context. Phrases like 'internal department transfer', 'management trainee', 'work prioritization', and 'company portfolio' show a good command of less common lexical items. Word choice and collocations are generally precise, such as 'enhanced my presentation skills and efficiency' and 'increase revenue through investment income'. There are only occasional minor inaccuracies, but vocabulary usage is natural and effectively communicates complex professional intentions, reflecting a solid Band 7 performance.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 8.0

The response features a good mix of simple and complex sentence structures. The candidate demonstrates control over dependent clauses and time markers, as seen in sentences like 'While I was working as a management trainee, I learned team management, work prioritization, and coordination with suppliers.' The majority of sentences are error-free, and punctuation is handled correctly throughout. Grammar and mechanics do not impede communication at any point, showing strong accuracy and a reliable grasp of complex syntactic forms appropriate for a high band score.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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