Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-09-22

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

 

You started in your present job two years ago. You now feel it is important for your career development to move to a different department in the same company.

Write a letter to your manager. In your letter

• say what you have learned in your present job
• suggest how the company would benefit from moving you to a different department
• explain why you do not wish to leave the company

You do NOT need to write any addresses.

Begin your letter as follows:

Dear ....................................,

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Dear Manager,

I am writing this letter to request you to shift me in another department as it is important to my career development.

Firstly, I would like to inform you that I have been working since two years as a sales associate, and I have learned all the skills like dealing with customer, handling store, managing stuff, and ordering items.

Secondly, If company move to me in marketing department then it will be beneficial to a business as I have deal with the number of customers face-to-face, and gain idea about, what is customer requirement. I think it will be great opportunity to me as well as the company for promoting their product in a customer understanding way.

Finally, I do not want leave this company because this company gave me the opportunity to learn essential skills when I was a fresher. Now, its my turn to support company by proper utilizing of my experience and skills what ever I have learn. This will help to both business as well as to me for growth.

I look forward to hearing from you soon.

Yours faithfully,

Nikesh Yadav

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.5

The response successfully covers all three bullet points required in the task instructions. You clearly stated what you have learned in your present job ('dealing with customer, handling store, managing stuff'), suggested how the company would benefit ('beneficial to a business as I have deal with the number of customers face-to-face'), and explained why you do not wish to leave ('this company gave me the opportunity to learn essential skills'). Your tone is appropriately formal for a business letter to a manager. While some ideas could be extended further to achieve a higher band, all parts of the task are addressed relevantly, and a clear purpose is maintained throughout.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The letter has a clear overall arrangement and follows a logical progression using standard letter conventions and cohesive markers. You successfully use sequencing words such as 'Firstly', 'Secondly', and 'Finally' to structure your arguments into distinct paragraphs. Paragraphing is used sufficiently and appropriately, separating the introduction, body points, and conclusion. However, referencing and cohesive devices occasionally feel slightly mechanical, such as 'If company move to me', which prevents the flow from being entirely natural. Overall, the organization is clear and easy to follow.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

Your lexical range is adequate for the task, successfully communicating your meaning and attempting some less common business-related vocabulary such as 'career development', 'sales associate', and 'marketing department'. However, there are noticeable word choice and collocation errors, such as writing 'managing stuff' instead of 'staff', 'If company move to me' instead of 'If the company transfers me', and 'proper utilizing' instead of 'proper utilization'. Despite these errors in word formation and precision, your vocabulary is sufficient to make your message clear to the reader.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

You demonstrate a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, incorporating conditional structures like 'If company move to me in marketing department then it will be beneficial'. However, your writing contains frequent grammatical errors, particularly with missing articles ('the' company, 'a' business), incorrect prepositions ('shift me in another department' instead of 'to'), and tense control ('have been working since two years' instead of 'for'). While these errors do not impede overall communication and the reader can easily understand your request, they demonstrate limited grammatical control that keeps the score at Band 5.5.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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