Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-09-22

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

 

You started in your present job two years ago. You now feel it is important for your career development to move to a different department in the same company.

Write a letter to your manager. In your letter

• say what you have learned in your present job
• suggest how the company would benefit from moving you to a different department
• explain why you do not wish to leave the company

You do NOT need to write any addresses.

Begin your letter as follows:

Dear ....................................,

Student answer (Band 5.0)

Dear sir,

I am writing to request you to move my department to another department for my significant career growth as well as organisational growth.

First of all, as a crew member of our company i am feeling very happy to work with our crew members. Moreover, i have gained my experience with my current position like my knowlege about organisation as well as i can handle each and every problem related to my field.

In addition, i would like to request you, i found a space for supervisor for our company. So, if i will be promoted by i can use my experience and knowledge for our company for internal and external growth.

Lastly, i had got planty of offers from another company as a supervisor. Because of my trust on company as well as good environment i have been declined.

your crew member,

patel

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0

The response attempts to cover all bullet points of the prompt, but it falls short in a few areas. You mentioned what you have learned generally and noted your knowledge of the organisation, and you touched upon why you want to move and why you are staying within the company by mentioning external offers and your trust in the firm. However, the explanation regarding the supervisor vacancy and how the company benefits is somewhat limited and unclear ('found a space for supervisor'). Furthermore, the Length Check reports that the text contains 146 words, which is below the 150-word minimum requirement. This negative constraint violation requires a slight downward adjustment to the Task Achievement score. Therefore, a band score of 5.0 is appropriate.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0

The letter uses some basic cohesive devices such as 'First of all', 'Moreover', 'In addition', and 'Lastly' to structure the response. However, paragraphing is poorly managed, and the letter format is compromised by the lack of clear stanza breaks and an informal, repetitive closing ("your crew member, patel"). Referencing is occasionally unclear, as seen in the phrase 'if i will be promoted by i can use my experience'. The overall organisation shows some progression, but the mechanical nature of the cohesive devices and structural lapses keep this criterion at Band 5.0.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.0

The vocabulary used is relatively basic and repetitive, with frequent use of words like 'crew member', 'company', and 'experience'. There are also noticeable word choice and collocation issues, such as 'move my department to another department' instead of 'transfer to another department', and 'i had got planty of offers' containing a spelling error ('planty') and overly informal phrasing. While the vocabulary is minimally adequate to convey the basic message, it lacks the precision and range required for higher bands, resulting in a band score of 5.0.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0

The response demonstrates a very limited range of sentence structures, relying primarily on simple sentences and awkward attempts at complex constructions. There are frequent grammatical errors throughout the text, including capitalization errors (e.g., lowercase 'i'), incorrect verb tenses ('i had got planty of offers', 'i will be promoted by i can use'), and awkward phrasing ('Because of my trust on company'). These errors cause some difficulty for the reader and reflect a weak control of grammar and punctuation, fitting the descriptor for a band score of 5.0.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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