Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-09-23

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

 

You started in your present job two years ago. You now feel it is important for your career development to move to a different department in the same company.

Write a letter to your manager. In your letter

• say what you have learned in your present job
• suggest how the company would benefit from moving you to a different department
• explain why you do not wish to leave the company

You do NOT need to write any addresses.

Begin your letter as follows:

Dear ....................................,

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Dear Sir,

I am writing to inform you that I have been working in Screen department for two years. Now I observe that I have to move to other department for my growth.

Since I joined this department I have learned various things which is not only beneficial for my future growth but also give me achance to familiar with tools.

I would appreciate it if you could me in buffing area, as I have fully conversent with tools so it will not be difficult for me to adjust in that department. Furrtheremore, there is shortage of worker and if company hire new person then one month tranning should be given to him. In my case there is no training need to me. Hence company can save traning money if I moved to here.

I would not like to leave this company, because I can grow my carrer in here and everyday I learn new things. in other place I will not get this atmospare.

I look forward to hearing from you.

Yours sincerely,

Jag

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

The response covers all three bullet points required in the task instructions. The student mentions learning various things and becoming familiar with tools in their present job (Screen department), suggests that moving them to the buffing area would benefit the company because no training is needed and training costs can be saved, and explains that they do not wish to leave the company because they can grow their career and enjoy the atmosphere. While the ideas are relevant, some parts are slightly under-developed and lack the formal tone expected in a workplace letter. However, all communicative requirements of the prompt are successfully met, warranting a solid Band 6.0.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The letter is structured with appropriate salutations and sign-offs, and basic paragraphing is used to separate the different points of the letter. Logical progression is attempted, as the writer moves from their current role to reasons for a transfer, company benefits, and finally reasons for staying. However, transitions between ideas are sometimes mechanical or abrupt, such as the sudden shift into cost savings and worker shortages. Cohesive devices are used sparingly and occasionally inaccurately, leading to a score of 5.5 for this criterion.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

The vocabulary used is adequate for the task, with attempts at less common workplace terminology such as 'conversent', 'beneficial', and 'shortage of worker'. However, there are notable spelling and word-choice errors, such as 'Furrtheremore', 'tranning', 'atmospare', and 'carrer'. Phrases like 'Now I observe that I have to move' and 'no training need to me' sound unnatural. The lexical range is minimally adequate to convey the message, fitting the Band 5.5 descriptor well.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

The student attempts a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, including conditional and relative clauses ('if company hire new person then one month tranning should be given to him'). However, there are frequent grammatical errors, such as missing articles ('in Screen department', 'in other place'), incorrect prepositions ('move to other department', 'conversent with tools'), and subject-verb agreement issues ('various things which is not only beneficial'). These errors occasionally cause minor strain for the reader, though they do not impede overall communication. This performance aligns with a Band 5.0.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.