Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-09-25
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
You started in your present job two years ago. You now feel it is important for your career development to move to a different department in the same company.
Write a letter to your manager. In your letter
- say what you have learned in your present job
- suggest how the company would benefit from moving you to a different department
- explain why you do not wish to leave the company
You do NOT need to write any addresses.
Begin your letter as follows:
Dear ....................................,
Student answer (Band 5.5)
Dear Mr. Smith,
I hope your are well. I'm writing a letter to express my interest toward the new vacancy for the pediatric physiotherapist role. I hope you get my
I am Kaira and working in this hospital from last two years as a physiotherapist in rehabilitation department. Moreover, I learned from how to deal with the elderly patients and developed skills such as leadership, team work and managment.
Therefore, I would like to go for a pediatric department and want to know more about how to deal with the children and neo natal babies. My this opportunity will not only beneficial for my personal growth but also helpful for hospital professional growth.As this will allow me to work in emergency cases as well as reduce the burden from my team memebers.
I really enjoy woking in this hospital and I do not want to leave at any cost. As I am satisfied with my work and payroll also I like the managment and team co-ordination work. So it is my humble request if can able to change my department for sometime I will be grateful for your help.
Yours faithfully,
Kaira
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0
The candidate addresses all parts of the prompt, though the development and integration of ideas are somewhat inconsistent. The letter mentions what has been learned in the present job, such as dealing with elderly patients and developing leadership skills. It also suggests how the company would benefit by mentioning emergency support and reducing team burdens, and explains why the writer wishes to stay in the company. However, there are task misunderstandings or contradictions, such as referring to a 'new vacancy for the pediatric physiotherapist role' while later asking to 'change my department for sometime', and an incomplete opening sentence ('I hope you get my'). Despite these minor flaws, the communicative purpose is achieved, fulfilling the requirements for a Band 6.0 rating.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0
The letter is arranged with an overall coherent structure, utilizing standard letter-writing conventions and paragraph breaks. However, the logical progression is at times disrupted by abrupt transitions and disjointed sentences, such as 'I hope you get my' and 'My this opportunity will not only beneficial'. Cohesive devices are used, but sometimes inaccurately or mechanically, as seen with 'Moreover' and 'Therefore' linking ideas that lack smooth conceptual continuity. Paragraphing is present and separates different aspects of the letter, but internal referencing and paragraph cohesion require better control to achieve a higher score. Overall, the organization is clear enough to earn a Band 6.0.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.5
The vocabulary used is adequate for the task, successfully conveying the basic message about career development and departmental transfer. The writer attempts some less common vocabulary and context-specific terms such as 'rehabilitation department', 'pediatric', and 'neo natal babies'. However, there are noticeable lexical errors and awkward word choices, including 'payroll' used instead of 'pay' or 'salary', 'managment' (spelling error), and 'woking' instead of 'working'. These errors do not seriously impede communication, but they restrict the lexical score to Band 5.5, as the range is limited and contains frequent inaccuracies.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0
The response demonstrates a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, attempting structures like 'My this opportunity will not only beneficial for my personal growth but also helpful for hospital professional growth.' However, grammatical control is weak, with frequent errors such as article omissions, preposition misuse ('working in this hospital from last two years'), and spelling or typo issues ('your are well'). There are also awkward phrasing constructions such as 'if can able to change my department'. While these errors occasionally cause strain for the reader, the meaning can still be understood, which aligns well with the descriptors for Band 5.0.
See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.
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